Lecture notes:

1. Maintenance and communication of strong and weak ties

Problems

1. When strong ties develop into weak ties How to reconnect and establish relationships when?

2. How to maintain various strong and weak relationships without using too much time and energy?

3. How to realize value exchange in weak relationships? Don’t want to be the taker and be indebted when asking for a favor?

The solution is as follows:

Thinking 1 When discussing a relationship, first ask yourself, is the value that the other party is willing to provide when you ask for help? At the same time, it should also be clear what value the two parties can provide to each other?

First think about what is the focus of the current stage?

The first step is to "define the purpose". After you have a clear goal, you can then plan the key points of the "weak ties" you want to strengthen.

The second step is to adjust your mentality: we refuse Raise a giant baby and reach out to the party, but you must also make it clear that when asking for the value of others, you must find the right person, and don't seek fish for nothing. Providing help to a friend can be regarded as an investment behavior. You do not expect the other party to repay you at the time, but it is an investment in maintaining the relationship. Providing your value is an investment in maintaining a relationship, with gains and losses. This is difficult to measure, just like everyone has different values ????to view things

Case:

Her job is: shipping agency,

Job content is: need Develop and collect the phone numbers of various captains along the Yangtze River and keep in touch.

At the same time, she loves to play mobile games and plays all kinds of games. The information collected is that most captains like to play King. It was finally determined that King is the main player, and most of them team up with the boss of the ship.

As for performance, he became a business elite within 3 months and developed multiple routes for the company.

Thinking and analysis: What model does she use to develop her business?

To sum up: using SWOT analysis to clarify needs based on purpose, you can find and solve problems very quickly and accurately.

Thought 2

How to revitalize your personal network? Especially those who live in different life circles and gradually have no intersection, let alone those who need each other's help as a node.

For this kind of person who has not been in contact for a long time, but will eventually need his help, how to make a living?

Key points are more complicated in real life:

1) Some people will still help you if you don’t need to contact them frequently as long as you need to find them.

2) There are some people who you have helped a lot in the past, but they still won’t help you in the future.

The specific method is as follows:

Generally, before asking for help, talk about the current situation and chat about household matters: to warm up the relationship quickly, and try to help anyone who can help.

1. Understand the other person’s background and ask how their work and family are lately?

2. Let the other person feel that you care about them. After all, they were good friends, colleagues, and partners before. I asked sideways and asked if there was anything I could do to help?

3. Then take the opportunity to tell me your purpose or after you have finished helping, ask if you can do me a favor. Directly explain the situation and express that the favor is not in vain and that you will be rewarded or exchanged with other values ??(the other party will give you an answer based on their own situation after understanding the situation)

If the answer is yes: it will be done Later, a dinner treat or material reward, resource recommendation, exchange (at your own discretion)

If you answer: NO: As the saying goes: "Business cannot be the end of friendship."

Don't cut off friendship because of a moment of inappropriateness: take the initiative to tell the other person what you can do to help them, and if you need help next time, you can ask for help, etc... The other person may change their mind because of your sincerity!

When maintaining weak relationships, you should pay attention to:

a. As long as you ask her for infrequent contact, she will still help you (friendship is like a credit card: it will make you feel good for a while, and it will always help you) Overdraft will capsize, it is better to maintain it on a daily basis)

b. For those who you have helped him a lot in the past, but he still won’t help you in the future (it starts with invitation and ends with ruthlessness: you can delete it! )

2. How to develop your own strong and weak relationships

Questions

1. How to naturally and proactively maintain weak relationships to avoid awkward conversations or harassment? For example, the relationship was very awkward or with a bad person (a former lover, someone who has never been able to get over) but in the future we need to cooperate and get along with each other for a long time.

2. How to communicate effectively with others (say more about what I want rather than what I should)?

3. Especially after communicating with strangers, how to break through weak relationships and further deepen communication practice?

Related processing methods:

First: Take the initiative Taking steps is the key - it is more about wanting to change, proving that you are trying to break through, giving yourself positive psychological hints, using strong relationships to bring yourself into gatherings or activities in other circles, and using the same topic as an opportunity. Communicate with others.

For example, if you want to learn to dance, and your friend’s boyfriend happens to open a hip-hop studio, you can participate in their studio activities, get to know more people who are learning hip-hop, and expand your network. .

Second: Maintenance is more valuable than "expansion"

1) Sort and interact with friends

a. Sort all friends by priority

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b. Top 10 (get together every 1-3 months: visit, dinner, tea)

c. Top 10-20 (get together every 3-6 months: Visit, dinner, and tea)

d. Other friends have the opportunity (get together once in June to December: visit, dinner, and tea)

e. All friends, holidays, birthdays Wait, I will send you a message to express my gratitude.

2) Keep good habits, details are very important

a. Never go to someone else’s house empty-handed

b. Separate friends who are not very familiar with each other. Finally, send a text message within half an hour to express that you are very satisfied with the meeting and that you have gained a lot.

c. No matter how good your friends are, don’t joke too much.

3) Know how to graft resources

It is very important to record the value of "resources" behind contacts: record the resources of friends in the address book, publish their social circles, and learn about their needs through communication with them .

4) To enter the circle

It is very important to use some kind of "medium" to enter the circle of contacts. Such as

Advanced academic positions, industry salons and hobby enthusiasts, etc.

5) Make good use of tools (Tools must be sharp to do their job well). Making good use of these tools will greatly expand your maintenance capabilities. I recommend a few useful networking tools: WeChat, IU Care, and Business Card Almighty.

Pay attention to the problem of thinking: Weak ties depend on their own positioning: are they strangers on WeChat or connections that need to be revitalized?