It’s a rainy night again

Drunk again, Xia Han curled up in the darkness of the sofa, silently thinking in his heart that he can’t see me, he can’t see me, his body kept shaking, his feet Feeling numb, but still not daring to move, listening to the sound of objects being thrown in the room, a man's roaring voice came over: Xia Han, get out of here, where did you die? Are you itchy? Xia Han suppressed his sobs and tried his best to conceal his presence. However, when he felt a figure above his head, he was greeted by being torn, beaten and scolded. Xia Han tried his best to escape, but his hair was torn apart. Pulled back, he was beaten even more violently, and finally he was dragged to the bed, his hair was pulled, and he took possession of it forcefully. Xia Han felt that his whole body was cold and numb, and the blood and pain seemed to have no consciousness. He seemed to be floating in the sky, feeling Suddenly it seemed like seeing heaven. After the man vented his anger, he rolled off his body. He was so drunk that he began to snore after a while. Xia Han thought that this round of torture was finally over. She didn't clean up her broken body like before. She curled up in a corner of the bed, feeling in her heart. I thought of my short life experience for no reason.

Broken body

Yes, my name is Xia Han. I was born in summer. I was born with a defect. I let my father feel the cold of winter in summer. This That's where my name comes from.

One of my eyelids is open, and the other is droopy. The eyelids are always droopy. As I grow up, the children ignore me and bully me. They say ugly, you go away. Come on, we don’t want you to play together. I am becoming more and more withdrawn and have low self-esteem. I want to grow up and I will gradually become better. I grow my hair long and cover my left eye. I feel like I'm just like a normal person.

When I was in college, my roommates and I were very happy together. Although I still only showed half of my face, my roommates didn’t care at all. They felt that I was normal and that I had a better understanding of life. Looking forward to love, I fell in love with Xiaohua. I felt that he also liked me, but I didn't dare to confess. I couldn't suppress my inferiority complex. I was afraid that he would dislike me and dislike me like others. Not perfect, I pretended to be cold and condescending. Later, Xiaohua’s friend told me that my attitude made Xiaohua think that I didn’t like him. I missed it because I hated that my body hated my dissatisfaction. Perfect, I want to have an ordinary relationship like every ordinary person. But the disability I was born with made me hesitate and retreat.

An indifferent first marriage

Yes, later I got married, and my parents arranged a blind date. I found someone who looked very honest and looked at me like a normal person. Boy, I want to live my life quietly, just be ordinary. I think as long as I work hard, I will be able to have an ordinary marriage.

After getting married, I gradually learned the tricks of a housewife. I think this is what I should learn. When it is very cold, I wash clothes with cold water but he ignores it; when it is very cold, I light up the stove. He said it was too expensive, so he put it out for me and went to his parents' place to keep warm. I wanted to make something delicious on New Year's Day, but it was just cabbage stew. I seemed to be invisible in some house, and everyone thought I didn't exist. Life is too hard. We are from an ordinary well-off family. Why do I do all the work but don't give me a little care? Why is it that I am not qualified to eat leftovers even though you have a nutritious diet of fish and meat? Why? Because you are here to give birth to children. Why else would I marry you? I don’t want to touch you at all. That’s right, I ran away. I begged my parents to let me go. I really couldn’t stay any longer. I didn’t want to be here if I wanted to be alone all my life.

A violent second marriage

Yes, I have remarried. It has been a long time since my divorce. My parents feel that I should still belong to someone, especially my sister-in-law. After hindering her, she introduced me to a man. I had no reason to refuse, because I didn't want my parents to be unhappy, and because I still had the slightest desire for tomorrow. This man was very kind to me at first, taking me to eat delicious food, buying me clothes, and growing taller. The withered flowers in my heart felt a little dew, and I told myself that this might be true love.

He has a daughter, yes, I don’t want to say his name at all.

After I got married, I discovered that the money for buying things was charged to my credit card. After we got married, we would pay it back together. It didn’t matter, as long as it was good to me.

It doesn’t matter if you can’t do heavy work during the day or work overtime because of bad eyesight at night. I’m here to run a small business. It doesn’t matter. Just be nice to me.

I’m worried that I have too much contact with men, so I’ll take you with me to let everyone know that you are my husband. It doesn’t matter, just be nice to me.

But the nightmare suddenly came. He was drunk. He beat me, scolded me and tore me apart. He abused me from body to mind. I was so scared. I wanted to leave, but the next day he When I wake up, I will kneel down, apologize, hit myself and beg for forgiveness. Yes, I have forgiven me again and again, but I am getting more and more afraid. I wonder if there is an end to this?

Is it dawn yet? Xia Han moved his body that had been curled up all night. The tearing pain made him wake up. He touched the knife that had been hidden aside and cut the arm with scars deeply. The blood flowed out. Xia Han felt in his heart Final thoughts: "Finally freed? I was reluctant to give up too hard before, but this time I seem to see heaven? God, please let me have a normal life in the next life. I am so tired in this life."< /p>