1

I am a 36-year-old woman with two children. I own a bakery and my business is very good.

Five years ago, my life was fairly happy. I have my own house and I don't have to pay back the loan. The son is smart and lovely, the husband is considerate, and his life is dull but full. Unfortunately, after I found out that my husband was cheating, all the peace was broken.

Tell us about our situation. He and I are college alumni. It was love at first sight. After six years of love, we got married. His family is in the countryside and the conditions are very poor. Nothing can help him.

When we got married, my parents bought the house in full. Because he has no money, I don't have a diamond ring, we didn't take wedding photos, and we didn't have a honeymoon. ...

After marriage, he worked in sales, and I found a company to work for. Later, I gave birth to a child, thought about it and decided to take it to kindergarten, so I resigned.

My parents have always been very kind to him, and he admits it, but there are still problems in our marriage. Five years ago, I found him cheating. Instead of repentance, he filed for divorce.

My personality is very weak. At that time, I thought that I had no job and my children were still young. I don't know what to do if I get divorced. So I begged him not to leave me.

Maybe I was too humble, and he got me. Although he agreed not to divorce, he was presumptuous. He never broke up with that woman, and sometimes he didn't go behind my back when he called or answered the phone. Even when my second child was pregnant for more than six months, he hit me because I scolded that woman.

Accidentally pregnant with a second child, the doctor said that the child is developing well. I thought it was at least a life, so I decided to have it. He didn't object either, saying that two children are also quite good. I still have the illusion that he will change his mind for the sake of the children.

After he hit me, I gave up completely and thought about divorce countless times. But I can't make up my mind. I'm worried that my children don't have a complete family, and it will be worse after divorce.

2

During this period, he lost money speculating in futures and owed millions, and people often came to ask for debts. He may have been hit hard, too. He doesn't go to class and doesn't care about family affairs. I have no choice but to stand up and make amends to the debtor.

He didn't contact that woman outside again. It is estimated that he has no money and people don't want to talk to him!

In those days, I was so helpless that I couldn't count on him. We have no income, but we spend money when we wake up every day.

At this time, it is my parents who lend a helping hand unconditionally. They paid to open a bakery for me in a good location. With this store, my mother's life is stable.

He hasn't given me a penny to live on since I got into debt, let alone pay off my debts. For a while, I spent my life in despair, but with the bakery on the right track, my mentality gradually adjusted.

In the past two years, I have become bad myself. I used to hate people who were unfaithful to their marriage. Unexpectedly, I turned out to be the kind of person I hate the most.

Yes, I lied to you, too, and more than one man.

When I took the first step, I didn't hesitate for long. That man, just call him C. He is very handsome and polite. He is my type. He often comes to the store to buy things, and he has a good impression on me.

I talked a lot and got a general understanding of C. He is married and has a decent job, but he has no feelings for his wife.

It seems that every man who hooks up with women outside will say that he has no feelings for his wife. I think it's a little ridiculous. However, if they say that they love their wives very much and that cheating is to have fun outside marriage, most people will ignore it!

The biggest reason I'm with C is to get back at my husband. There is a saying: you have sex, I have an affair.

I think my husband divorced me because there was a woman outside. He was pregnant with me for that woman. He was indifferent to our mother ... I think only by cuckolding him can we calm down the inner grievances.

three

I stayed with C for more than three months, and then he went to other places because of his job transfer. We parted peacefully. People are like this, some things are afraid to try, so they always keep their distance, but once they try, they find nothing, so they get out of hand.

I found my second lover soon after I left C. Of course, I'm not just looking for it. I have two conditions: I must get married and I must have a decent job.

Such a man will be more worried about the exposure of extramarital affairs than I am, so he will be cautious. If I want to be apart, they won't pester me, let alone threaten me.

In the past two years, I have slept with more than a dozen men. On the surface, those men look well dressed, but in private, they are different.

I can get double happiness by sleeping with other men. When my husband and I are sweet, we are very harmonious in bed. He will kiss me gently beforehand and hug me afterwards to chat. But later, he went straight to the point and only cared about his own happiness, regardless of my feelings.

And the man outside marriage, every time can make me particularly satisfied, comfortable as falling into the clouds. This simple physical happiness can make me forget the depression in my life for a while.

On the other hand, sleeping with another man, I think it is a kind of revenge for my husband. He doesn't cherish me. There are many men out there who want me.

Now, I have two fixed lovers. One is outside and will come to our place on business every month. He will take me to the hotel and have sex with me. Another one is local. He has an empty house, where we secretly date.

The two of them didn't know each other existed. Of course, maybe I'm not the only one. I don't care. Anyway, every time, I will ask them to wear condoms.

four

Although the writing is chic, it is actually very tangled inside. Because I know I was wrong and immoral. Although I didn't mean to destroy other people's families, of course I hurt those women.

Sometimes I hate myself and feel sick. My two children are both lovely. Seeing them, I feel that I am not a good mother and I am particularly sorry for them.

Although I do a good job of keeping secrets, there is no windtight wall in the world. When I can't sleep, I can't help thinking, what will others think of my children if they know that I am such a dissolute woman? How sad should my parents be?

Occasionally, it will be shameful to see someone scolding a mistress in the WeChat group. I used to scold the woman outside my husband. What is the difference between me and that woman now?

I want to break up with those two lovers, but I can't make up my mind. My life has been a mess, and there must always be an emotional outlet. Their existence adds some fun to my life.

Now the bakery income is ok. I plan to open a branch somewhere. When I am too busy, my parents will help me pick up the children. Although most of the money I earned has been paid off, I have no complaints. I just want to pay it off as soon as possible, so the pressure will be less. As for my husband, I don't care if he is dead or alive.

Summon up the courage to write these, and you will be relieved. I know many people will scold me, and I deserve it.

///Reply///

Hello, dear, thank you for trusting me and telling me your story.

I won't scold you today, I just suggest that you can get a divorce. You don't have to bear so many debts of your husband, look at him in every way.

It is best if children can grow up in a complete family, but if the family is complete without warmth and love, this family is better than nothing.

Your husband cheated recklessly, lost money speculating in futures, and had no intention of repentance at all. He looks half dead all day. You can give him up and let him die.

Now that you are financially independent and not attached to him, there is naturally no need to carry him forward. Whether you cheat or help him pay his debts, it is to make up for the vacancy in your marriage. But haven't you noticed? This kind of compensation is drugs, which gives you temporary satisfaction, but the heart is more empty and painful.

You said you hurt women in other families, and you were sorry for your children. What can I say? I think since it happened, there is no need to continue to hurt with guilt and regret. Otherwise, it's like saying sorry to someone and slapping him at the same time. As long as the injury doesn't stop, there is no point in apologizing.

Besides, don't always take yourself so seriously. No matter other women or their own children, they may not value your so-called "injury" as much as you think. Just as your happiness can't depend on others, you can't bear the happiness of others.

Therefore, we must not break the jar and break it. You should strive to make yourself better and seek inner satisfaction. This is better than anything.

Whether a man exists or not is just an external cause. All men are dispensable to you at present. Yes, the icing on the cake. No, it won't have much impact on your life. I think you can try to get rid of the comfort brought by men and try to make yourself strong.

Otherwise, it's no use helping your husband pay his debts or having an affair with other men now. These things are meaningless, except that they are a kind of consumption for themselves.

Munger said: Face up to your big problem and don't hide it. So, you should try to make yourself dignified, not just by sleeping with men! When people are alive, there are many things that can enrich your life more than sex.

What did you say?/Sorry?

The 34-year-old husband derailed the 52-year-old aunt, and the woman collapsed and cried: Where am I not as good as her?

I recently saw such a thing on Minsheng Channel on the Internet. Ms. Wang, aged 365,438+0, has family problems. Her child's father, Ding Mou, 34, cheated on Ms. Qiao, 52, causing her to collapse and fall into doubt. "What am I inferior to her?"

It is understood that Ms. Wang and Ding lived together for three years. Although they are not married, their son is one year old. The intimate relationship between them is not that husband and wife are better than husband and wife, and they usually live like ordinary husband and wife. After knowing Joe in May this year, Dante didn't stop his relationship with Joe until it was discovered by Ms. Wang. Although, everyone has the right to pursue love and freedom. However, Joe has a child who lives with his mother and is irresponsible to other women. There is no moral bottom line at all.

As a bystander, I can feel the collapse of Ms. Wang. What a woman fears most is not that a man is having an affair, but the object of his affair, and the conditions in all aspects are far from you. When you know the truth, your self-confidence will collapse instantly. Are you really so bad?

I also saw some netizens asking questions online: Why can't a lady in her thirties be better than an aunt in her fifties? Ms. Wang should still find her own reasons. This view also makes me speechless. In fact, men have stable partners and children, but they still have sex outside. The main reason may not be women.

From a psychological point of view, people have five needs. If a person's minimum needs are met, he will pursue higher satisfaction, or he will do what he desires most. When a man has a stable life, has enough to eat and drink, and his personal safety is not challenged, he will rise to the level of social needs, find a spouse, carry on the family line, and fulfill the needs of social continuity. When he has a stable partner and children, he may look for new excitement, such as cheating. As for the object of cheating, it depends on their personal preferences and moods.

In other words, a man has a stable partner and a child. He is fooling around outside. It must be that he didn't handle the conflict between his own needs and his family, broke the moral bottom line and hurt his family. In any case, there is no moral way for men to "wash white".

Of course, if a man cheats and a woman becomes a victim of this relationship, she may want to recover, find out the reasons for her emotional failure and try to reflect on herself. Isn't she beautiful enough? Usually too hard on him? Not considerate of him, and so on. However, women don't have to blame themselves too much, because in intimate relationships, he is the first to betray. What women need to do is to separate themselves from the identity of the victim.

34-year-old man derailed 52-year-old female civil servant was reported by his girlfriend! Aunt's reaction is very clear.

Many small partners

I don't like watching palace dramas and family ethics dramas.

I think it's too ridiculous, too circuitous, too complicated …

But sometimes

Life is far more complicated than TV series.

Recently, Ms. Wang, 3 1 year-old, was online.

Report 52-year-old Joe

Step into your own family

Fly with your "husband"

Photo of Joe provided by Ms. Wang

Ms. Wang told reporters

Real name report

Staff of a Bureau in Puyang City, Henan Province

52-year-old Joe has a bad lifestyle.

Know each other clearly

There are also families and wives who are breastfeeding.

When the child has just passed 1 year old,

Interfere with each other's families

With her husband (34 years old) Ding Moumou

Maintain an improper relationship between men and women

Leading to the breakdown of marriage and divorce.

"Now the child is raised by me alone. I can't work with my children, and I have no place to live. I can only take my children back to my family. "

Reporter Wang.

Ms. Wang said that by looking at her husband's mobile phone, she found that Ding Moumou and Qiao Mou added WeChat on May 25th. Later, Ding Moumou helped Joe's friend to do something, and Joe asked him to eat braised pork. "Chatting is irrigation, now I understand."

Net exposure of various evidences of two people together ↓↓↓

Ms. Wang listed to reporters

Through various channels.

Neither of the two people found is evidence of proper relationship.

During the period when Ding Moumou has not "dissolved the marriage relationship"

The two were together in the middle and late July.

I spent three days and two nights in Anyang.

Then I went to Hebi.

On one occasion, Ding's car violated the rules.

Ms. Wang said that at 2 o'clock in the afternoon of July 29, her son hit his left eyelid and had four stitches in the burn department of the hospital. July 3 1, less than 1 1. Ding Moumou left his son and daughter-in-law who needed dressing change in the staff hospital, and asked them to change their dressing and go by car, saying that they were going on a business trip. In fact, they were meeting Joe to visit Qingdao.

Finally, Ding Moumou couldn't wait any longer.

So on August 8,

Signed a "divorce agreement"

Then I lived directly at Joe's house.

The agreement shows that

Introduced Ms. Wang and Ding Moumou.

20 19 1.4 wedding ceremony.

Start living together in the name of husband and wife

Neither party is registered to get married.

20 19 gave birth to a son on June 20th.

The two sides dissolved the cohabitation relationship because of emotional disharmony.

After the cohabitation relationship is dissolved, the son is raised by the woman.

The man bears alimony.

From 10 in 2020.

Pay the maintenance fee of 2500 yuan per month before the 5th of each month.

Until the son 18 years old.

In terms of property, the bank deposit is 260,000, of which 240,000 belongs to the man, the watch with a value of 1 10000 belongs to the man, the BMW 5 Series sedan belongs to the man, and the children belong to the woman. The man pays 50,000 yuan in compensation to the woman in installments.

The reporter found the other person, Joe.

Joe said

Ms. Wang and Ding Moumou are cohabiting.

Himself and his lover Ding Moumou

August this year 18

When registering for marriage in the Civil Affairs Bureau

His marital status is single, and he is single himself.

For Ms. Wang' s report on the Internet,

Joe said:

"Ms. Wang also sent some content in her circle of friends on September 6. At that time, her lover Ding Moumou asked Ms. Wang to delete it. She didn't respond at that time and didn't contact Ms. Wang directly. This time it was posted on a self-media page. I think some words are inappropriate. If the impact expands, I will consider suing. "

Joe said that after this happened,

Network Information Office and Discipline Inspection Department of this unit

Communicate with unit leaders.

Think of it as a personal life and have no right to interfere.

So, it has no effect on your work.

Joe emphasized that he was not a leader.

Just an ordinary staff member of a bureau in Puyang city

But anyway,

Ms. Wang and Ding Moumou are cohabiting.

Not protected by law.

They don't have a legal marriage.

The agreement is also to dissolve the cohabitation relationship.

Joe thinks that Ms. Wang has her own problems.

"I think a mature person should treat all this correctly. You have been together for more than three years, and your child is over one year old, but you haven't got a marriage certificate yet. Is this normal? There must be something between us. Even without me, there may be others. She is a beautiful and kind young girl of 3 1 year old. If there is no problem, she won't lose to this old woman with a one-year-old son. It should be their own problem. "

The reporter called the office of a bureau in Puyang city

And the discipline inspection and supervision office of a bureau in Puyang city

The staff said

I haven't been here alone long.

Know nothing about it.