The biggest difficulty in finding the same topic is not knowing each other, so the first problem to be solved in talking with others is to get familiar with each other as soon as possible and eliminate strangeness. You can try to get to know him through keen observation in a short time: his hairstyle, his clothes, his tie, his cigarette case, lighter, his carry-on bag, his tone, his eyes and so on. , can provide you with clues to understand him. If he is the owner of the house, you will have more basis to know him: paintings hanging on the wall, furnishings in the cupboard, photos under the counter, books in the bookcase and so on. These will naturally reveal the owner's hobbies and accomplishments to you. If you know in advance that you are going to meet a stranger, it is very beneficial for you to inquire about this stranger through others before meeting.

Once, a salesman went to a company to sell computers and came across several books on financial investment on the shelf of the boss of the company. The salesman happened to be interested in financial investment, so he talked with the boss about investment. As a result, the two chatted enthusiastically, from stocks to foreign exchange, from insurance to futures, about the appreciation of RMB, and about the best investment model. As a result, they all forgot the time.

It was not until noon that the boss suddenly remembered and asked the salesman, "What about the products you sold?" The salesman immediately seized the opportunity to introduce him. The boss said, "OK, no problem, let's sign the contract!" "

You see, finding the same topic as the other person to achieve "* * *" makes you relax, and he is happy, which can be said to be happy.

If you want to have a "* * *" with each other, the key is to find a topic. Someone said, "You should learn the skill of finding words without words in conversation." The so-called "talking" means "talking" Writing an article with a good topic is often full of ideas. Talking, with a good topic, can make the conversation free. The criteria for a good topic are: at least one party is familiar and can talk about it; Everyone is interested and loves to chat; There is room for discussion.

So, how to find the topic? We should start from the following aspects:

(1) Choose events that people care about as topics, and aim the topic at everyone's excitement center. This kind of topic is something that everyone wants to talk about, loves to talk about and can talk about. If everyone has something to say, it will naturally go on, and even cause many people to talk, resulting in "language" splashing.

(2) Cleverly borrow some materials of time, place and characters at that time to start a dialogue. Some people are good at improvising topics with the help of each other's name, hometown, age, clothing, room, etc. , and often can achieve good results. The key is to be flexible and natural, using local materials. The key is to be quick-thinking and be able to connect one with the other.

(3) Ask some questions of "throwing stones to ask the way" first, and then talk with a destination after knowing a little, so that you can talk more freely. For example, if you meet a strange neighbor on the train, you can "throw stones" and ask, "Where is your brother from?" This is the opportunity to "sing" with each other.

(4) Ask strangers' interests, ask questions according to their interests, and get into the topic smoothly. If your opponent likes poker, you can use it as a topic to talk about the fun of playing poker. If you know a thing or two about poker, it must be speculation; If you don't know much about poker, this is also an opportunity to learn. You can listen quietly, ask questions in time and open your eyes.

(5) Try to shorten the distance, get to know each other as much as possible in a short time, shorten each other's distance, and try to achieve emotional harmony. Confucius said, "No common goal, no common goal." Like-minded people can talk to each other, and "* * *" can happen. If we want to talk about speculation, we should make a fuss about the word "reason" and change the word "fate" into "reason".

The conversation should be interesting, speculative and pleasant, and both sides should have topics of common interest, which can arouse the "* * *" of both sides. Only when both sides have "* * *" can we communicate deeply and happily. In fact, as long as both sides pay attention, it is not difficult to find that they have the same views on a certain issue, have the same hobbies and interests in a certain aspect, and have certain things that everyone cares about.

Find a topic with "* * * Ming" with each other.

Now that technology is developed, everyone listens to MP3 and MP4, but I believe everyone has heard of the radio. The radio has a frequency band, and only when you dial that frequency band can you receive information. If you want to listen to Beijing Blues, you have to dial 10 1.8 MHz Beijing Blues. If you want to listen to Beijing Communications, you have to dial Beijing Communications 103.9 MHz. You want to listen to the news, there is a news frequency band; You want to listen to music, there is a special music station. Only by finding a special frequency band can you hear the program you want to listen to.

In fact, the same is true when communicating with everyone. Everyone has a corresponding frequency band. Only when you enter the frequency band recognized or liked by them and enter his range can you "talk" with him, and our communication with them will be very smooth or smooth.

So how can we get into the track or frequency band of the dialogue object? If you want to enter the track or frequency band of the conversation object, the key is to "synchronize" with the other party. What is synchronization? Is to be able to reach a "* * * tone" with each other. What you say, the other party is willing to listen, willing to listen, this is a kind of "* * *".

As we all know, when looking for a partner, the first requirement is language communication. If there is no same language, how embarrassing it is for two people to be together! The same is true of dealing with people. When communicating with others, you should find the same topic with each other and have a * * * with each other, so that the dialogue with each other can be carried out happily.

A well-chosen topic can make people feel like friends at first sight and meet each other late; If it is not handled properly, it will lead to four eyes facing each other and embarrassment.

Not long ago, Lao Zhang was staying in a hotel on a business trip, and a person who had checked in before him was leisurely lying in bed watching TV programs. Lao Zhang put down his travel bag, washed it a little, made a cup of strong tea, and said to the person walking in front, "How long has Master been here?" "It won't be long."

"You are from Beijing, aren't you?"

Oh, Baoding!

"Ah, Baoding is a good place! I learned it in the comic book "Plain Gunfire" in elementary school. I went to Baoding three years ago and went to Baiyangdian with great interest. I really like watching the story of the Xiang Yan team in Baiyangdian! " Hearing this, the Baoding guests immediately became interested, and they started talking with the Xiang Yan team from Baiyangdian. Those who are affectionate and don't know the details will probably think that they came together.

From acquaintance, conversation to final familiarity, they found the similarities between "Baiyangdian" and "Xiang Yan Team".