Author Huang Hui
Zhejiang University Press Blue Lion Press
Release date: 202 1 year: 1 month.
harvest
The compound interest of love means that when a person invests energy and time in a relationship, the utility he can obtain may increase exponentially with energy and time, rather than linearly. In this case, people have reasonable motivation to continue to devote their main energy to a certain relationship.
Or, explain it this way:
His love can inspire more of her love, and her love in turn can inspire more of his love, and so on. Love inspires love, and love produces love.
Partnership: Marriage is not love, but partnership. (e.g. house of cards)
Compound interest: two people jointly manage an investment fund, not money, but love between two people. If managed well, this kind of love can grow with time, which is called love compound interest.
1) Love and be loved
Love is appreciation. Appreciate: discover, understand, taste and appreciate.
Being loved: When you really feel loved, it should be a feeling of being awakened. Of course, it's not the feeling of being awakened by an alarm clock, but waking up from laziness and chaos, and the whole world suddenly becomes bright.
Love: fatherly love, self-love, sex and fraternity.
Antisense of love: contempt (including contempt and contempt)
The deadly "four knights" of marriage: criticism, contempt, defense and the cold war.
When you despise people, you don't treat people as people, you can't appreciate each other's beauty, and you won't protect and achieve each other's beauty. Instead, you gain a sense of conceit and completely distance yourself from each other. )
1) Establish love and realize the unity of people.
2) Establish a chain of contempt and express your position.
7. To have a sense of happiness in life, there are nothing more than three things: cherish the people around you, cherish the people beside you, and cherish yourself.
* * * Responsiveness means that when one person reveals his needs, desires or vulnerability, another person will clearly pay attention to the former's happiness and respond in a way that promotes his happiness.
In a responsive relationship, partners pay attention to each other's needs and happiness, meet each other's needs and promote each other's happiness. They are sure that the other party will do the same.
Therefore, they feel safe, reliable and relaxed in their relationship.
The importance of response lies not only in the actual effect of the response itself, but also in the psychological level, especially in providing a lasting sense of security for the partner so that he can relax, enjoy and explore life.
1) positive words
2) the moment of caution
3) accept gifts
4) Service of litigation
5) Physical contact
Affirmation requires me to observe him and praise him with words;
Careful moments need to listen to him attentively;
Accepting gifts does not mean buying expensive gifts, but providing a visual symbol of love-also providing a service;
These projects, coupled with physical contact, are actually spending time and energy to provide comprehensive services to each other in hearing, sight and touch.
aha
1, "finite and infinite games" wrote: "There are at least two kinds of games in the world. One can be called finite game and the other is called infinite game. The limited game aims at winning, and the unlimited game aims at continuing the game.
2. (Do you judge morality? )
Not treating people as human beings or objectifying them is the root of all immorality.
3. Liu Yu: "Love is a small animal. Raising it needs to be delicious and delicious every day. Without small movements, crush is so short and then withers. "
idea
1. The author made an argument for himself, and then found various data and cases to prove his argument.
2. Recommended index: 2 stars.