I think I have a good say in this issue. When my parents are here, it seems that my brothers and sisters have no contradictions and problems. I feel that the whole family is harmonious, and when my parents are gone, problems come one after another. I have a brother and two sisters. I am the youngest in my family and a laid-off worker. My brothers and sisters have married and have their own children. I also have a husband and children. My family conditions are better than mine. I am laid off, so the responsibility of taking care of my parents falls on me. My parents are 7 or 8 years old and can take care of themselves. As for me, I just cook for them, wash clothes and tidy up my home. Fortunately, my parents and I are in the same neighborhood, which is quite convenient. After cleaning up my home every day and cooking for my husband and children, I cook for the old couple and sleep at my parents' house at night. My brother and sister are basically not very convenient. In terms of money, my brothers and sisters were generous, and they bought things for their parents, including me, without stint. At that time, they really felt very happy. Although they were tired physically, they were very satisfied. After almost ten years, after sending their parents away, they returned to normal life, and the contradiction came out. First, they had a quarrel with their sisters for their parents' house. At the beginning, it was agreed that whoever served their parents would have the house in the future, and their parents left. This agreement was abolished, and finally. I don't participate, but I don't associate with each other. I don't make a phone call for a year. Every 3 nights, I call to pay New Year's greetings. I want to answer the phone, and I'm done with it. I don't want to answer it. I didn't answer it at all. At the beginning, my parents said that their parents were gone, so my home must be there, and everyone should get together during the Chinese New Year holiday. Now, just like that, my parents are here, my home is there, and my parents are gone, and my home is gone My husband's father died when he was 1 years old. At that time, there were brothers and sisters and two younger brothers. The old woman died at the age of 87 the year before last. She had a pension of more than 2, yuan and had no house or car ticket all her life, so no one cared about her. She only went to the mahjong room to play every day. She used to live in the house built on the top floor of Laoyao. Later, she was demolished and no one accepted her. She stayed in the hospital for more than 2 days. Others talked about being busy, taking grandchildren and nephews. There is no way to take my mother-in-law to us and I can't live here. I had to rent a room and a living room on the first floor. When she didn't want to cook, my husband sent it down every day. If she didn't want to stew a large pot of soup for her, she didn't want to come up. After all, my mother-in-law and I couldn't talk, and I wanted to. I never ate a mouthful of rice from my mother-in-law. I didn't drink her soup, didn't take care of my children for a day, and felt that she was a stranger who was worse than an outsider. I didn't have any feelings for her, but she lived alone for decades. Every year during the Chinese New Year holiday, we went to give her some money to play mahjong and buy her a bunch of food. Our children have never given lucky money since childhood, and have never seen such a mother-in-law? Her girl daughter-in-law gave birth to a baby, so she didn't go to see it, and she didn't take care of anyone. No one thinks highly of what she cooked herself that she didn't want to eat. She didn't say that she had a table of food for the New Year's Eve dinner, but everyone took food every year. Neighbors say that my husband is a dutiful son, and they all think that my mother-in-law only gave birth to her husband and a son. My husband said that her mother-in-law had been playing mahjong all her life, and she didn't care who was big or small. She was 87 years old when she smoked and played cards all her life, and she didn't know what a worldly person was. She was not angry when other children didn't come to see her when she was old, and she also knew that I loved smoking and playing mahjong all my life. After I died, you would burn more money so that I could play big cards. And burn a good mahjong. I can do it. This died the year before last. We informed her that all her other children had come, or my husband gave her a funeral. I always think that people are watching, and neighbors say that giving us thumbs up is worthy of our conscience. My husband says that his mother has never given us warmth in her life, but she gave birth to me, that is, my mother, and she doesn't care about me, otherwise she is not a person. Before my mother-in-law left, she said that I didn't expect to enjoy your blessings when I was old. After the death of her mother-in-law, her husband's brothers and sisters stopped seeing each other, and even Tomb-Sweeping Day went his own way. Originally, my mother-in-law didn't communicate much when she was here, but after she left, she was not as good as an outsider friend. Nowadays, people are too realistic. If you are a rich mother-in-law, you can see who comes frequently. Family ties are no longer like when we were children, and they have all gone bad. Do you still associate with such sisters?

Because everyone grew up together when they were young, if there are many brothers and sisters, parents' love can't be balanced, and people will think that their parents are partial to someone. For example, in a patriarchal family, there are generally many brothers and sisters. Except for the favored one, others are reluctant to talk to him, so that their parents can maintain their superficial affection when they are around. However, after their parents leave, no one wants to associate with the person who has taken care of their parents since childhood, and naturally the relationship is alienated.

when parents are around, they are a family. If parents are not around, who wants to see people who have been hated since childhood?

Nowadays, some family relationships are very complicated, especially in rural areas. There is a large family, and brothers and sisters will gather at their parents' homes on holidays. How lively it is! Mom used to like this atmosphere when she was a child!

but, strangely enough, when my parents were alive, my brothers and sisters had a very harmonious relationship and often walked around and missed each other!

However, after the death of parents, brothers and sisters seem to have lost their "backbone", and they seldom communicate with each other. If they are not on holidays, they may not make a phone call. Why?

Brother and sister who haven't seen each other for seven years meet again because of their parents' death.

A few days ago, Dou Ma saw a story on the Internet:

Xiaowan was born in the countryside, the youngest in the family, with two brothers and one sister.

As we all know, the concept of "son preference" has always existed in some areas of our country, and Xiaowan's family is no exception.

My parents love my two brothers very much, but they despise my sister and Xiaowan relatively. Fortunately, the economic conditions at home are better, and Xiaowan and her sister have both been admitted to the university successfully, which also makes the girls in the same village very envious.

Later, Xiaowan married in a foreign country and had little contact with her family. At most, she went back on holidays, had a superficial reunion, said some polite words to her brother and sister, and went home immediately after the first day.

Later, after her parents died of illness, Xiaowan had less contact with her brother and sister. In the past seven years, she only called several times and never met each other.

Until last year in Tomb-Sweeping Day, Xiaowan went home to worship her ancestors after seven years, and met her brother and sister again, but she didn't know what to say. Seeing each other again was "like knowing each other again".

after the two brothers inherited the house left by their parents, they treated the two sisters warmly, but they all said some polite words. The four of them were very unfamiliar and the atmosphere was very embarrassing.

Xiao Wan bluntly said, "Actually, I have a very ordinary relationship with my brother. When I was a child, I felt that my parents were unfair and always favored my brother. If I didn't have some spare money at home, I might have gone to the fields to do farm work like other girls in the village and just married a local man."

Of course, Xiaowan only complains to her parents, and has no resentment, otherwise she wouldn't go home for reunion when her parents were alive. However, because of her parents' face, Xiaowan will behave very friendly with her brothers.

what's the difference between a parent's life and a parent's death? The answers given by the three sisters are too realistic

There are five people, parents and three sisters in an ordinary family in Xinbin County, Fushun City.

Ms. Liu is the second of the sisters, and she belongs to the "middleman". Once her sister and her sister compete for something good, she will come forward to mediate.

Even so, the relationship between the three sisters is very harmonious. When the younger sister was bullied by the girls in the class, she and the older sister once went to school to beat the bully. When the elder sister was lovelorn, she and her younger sister also comforted the elder sister, and * * * ran to the top of the mountain to look at the stars to eliminate their worries.

When they grow up, the three sisters have their own families. Although they are no longer as close as when they were children, they all take time to get together in their hometown. On holidays, parents' birthdays and when their parents are sick, the three sisters will get together.

eldest sister is married to a businessman and often travels around; My sister also married a man with a rich family, and she didn't worry about food and clothing; Only Ms. Liu married a door-to-door son-in-law, and her life is the most common among the three sisters.

Later, when their parents died unexpectedly while traveling abroad, they didn't even leave a will. At this moment, the three sisters tore their faces.

Ms. Liu feels that her life is the poorest, and her eldest sister and third sister are married to the rich, so she should inherit most of the property herself.

Elder sister feels that since her parents are gone, she is the head of the family and should inherit most of the property.

Xiaomei thinks that the elder sister is married to a businessman, and the second sister is not well off, so it is reasonable to sell the house in her hometown and divide it into three parts.

However, Ms. Liu is married to a son-in-law. After the house is sold, where will she and her husband live? Therefore, the three sisters are deadlocked and torn apart, and they decide that after this matter is solved, they will never contact each other again.

after parents died, brothers and sisters didn't contact each other? It may also be related to this factor.

When parents died, the relationship between brothers and sisters was broken? This is not unexpected.

Ms. Fupoai shared her "secret family history" on social platforms:

To tell the truth, I met a good husband who was extremely rich, so I also lived a rich life.

I don't care if people say that I am rich. What does it matter if a woman is rich? However, I have two brothers and one younger brother, and none of them can make it!

if you want to study but not study, and if you want to look unattractive, I wonder if this elder brother and sister are held by the wrong parents, or if I am not born to my parents. The gap is too big.

When my parents were alive, they often said to me, "Little Ai, your two brothers and younger brothers are incompetent. If you marry a good family and help their brothers and sisters more, at least we are a family."

even if I don't like my brother and younger brother, I should think about what my parents said. After all, I wouldn't be where I am today without my parents' nurturing.

So, I often lend money to my brother and younger brother, and even help to repay the loan. This life lasted for five years, and even my husband couldn't stand it. At this time, my parents got sick and passed away one after another.

as soon as I arranged my parents' affairs, I blacked out my brother's and younger brother's phone numbers, and at the same time sold the house I live in and moved to another place.

after I shared my home with my friend, she said I had no feelings.

I think if you don't have feelings, you can't have feelings. Don't worry about this lazy brother and brother! Actually, when I first lent them money, I wanted them to do a little business. I never thought they would squander all the money I borrowed.

I don't want to associate with such poor relatives who are not motivated. Do you think it's wrong for me to do so?

why are brothers and sisters estranged when parents are gone? These four reasons are deeply rooted in reality

1. Parents are biased < P > If parents have the concept of "favoring boys over girls" or are particularly biased towards one child, other children will be hostile to this child, which will lead to disharmony between brothers and sisters.

When parents are alive, brothers and sisters will still make superficial relationships. After parents pass away, brothers and sisters will tear their faces and die of old age.

2. Property distribution

After the death of parents, property distribution is a big problem. Even if parents leave a will, some people will be unconvinced and want to compete for property.

Before Stanley Ho, the gambling king of Macau, died, his wife and son staged a "house fight". After the death of Father Ho, I believe his wife and children will stage a second "house fight".

once the parents' property distribution is unreasonable, the relationship between brothers and sisters, no matter how good they used to be, may become worse. The reality is so cruel, right?

3. Don't want to talk to poor relatives

Soul torture-which is more important, money or relatives?

in reality, it is not surprising that some people may choose money more important.

even if the relatives are poor, if they are always looking for trouble, it will be very tormenting!

Ms. Ai is a typical example. Her brother and younger brother are "helpless dou", also known as "vampires". Faced with such poor relatives, most people will choose to run away, right?

4. Other reasons

When brothers and sisters grow up, they all have their own life focuses and have to take care of their families.

When their parents are alive, they may take time to get together. When their parents are gone, they may shift their focus to their own homes, which also leads to their lack of time to contact their relatives.

Besides, some people may go to other places when they grow up. Due to geographical reasons, it is very inconvenient to go out for a long trip. Unless it is a wedding, brothers and sisters will not get together.

Message from Mama Dou

Why did the brothers and sisters stop seeing each other when their parents died? These three women told the truth!

Old people often say, "One generation is close, the second generation is superficial, and the third generation and the fourth generation can't recognize it."

Dear moms and dads, do you still keep in touch with your brothers and sisters? Come and share your story!

the country is everyone, and the home is a small country. One of the cultural cores of China is "harmony". When parents are here, brothers and sisters can get together. Because parents care for and tolerate every child, parents can be kind to those who have their own interests, and they will become grass on the wall. Morality has been ignored by the world to be the priority among relatives, benevolence and righteousness are not reflected among relatives, social progress is not reflected in family harmony, and history records the reality that our current small families are not harmonious and benefit is substituted for benevolence.

China has a tradition of respecting elders and ancestors.

Parents are still alive, and children are busy anyway, so they should visit their parents on holidays, so that brothers and sisters can get together and get in touch.

Since parents are dead, there is no reason for children to get together. If they get together again, they need feelings or interests as an intermediary.

Unfortunately, due to the lack of resources, eccentricity and other reasons, the older generation's parents did not have deep feelings for their brothers and sisters, and even had old grievances with each other. Everyone had their own things to do, so it was natural that they would not communicate with each other.

It's not surprising that there is no such thing as a farewell dinner, and some parents don't get along with their brothers and sisters. One is emotion, the other is economy, and the third is the background environment. I have feelings from childhood to old age, and it is the same thing to grow up without feelings. In addition, parental education is also related to the boss's words and deeds. The boss behaves well, cares about his younger brothers and sisters, and pays them back. The younger brothers and sisters will respect the boss as they treat their parents. Mutual respect, tolerance and consideration, and the banquet that never ends will be prolonged.

There is a good saying, when parents are here, there is still room for life, and when parents go, life.