Life has dreams, and Zhimo has dreams. His life is full of dreams of ideals and love.

"Gently I left, just as I came gently, waving my sleeves without taking away a single cloud." When I entered Xu Zhimo's former residence and saw the newly renovated exhibition hall , I couldn't help but think of Xu Zhimao's poems that have influenced several generations of young people.

Xu Zhimo’s former residence is at No. 38 Ganhe Street, Xiashi Town, Haining City, Zhejiang Province. The exterior walls of the Western-style villa are made of blue bricks and caulked with mortar. No paint is needed, let alone ceramic tiles. , but the few yellow bricks inlaid on the wall look very bright, adding a three-dimensional effect to the villa. The villa was originally the wedding room of the poet Xu Zhimo and his first wife Zhang Youyi. This perfect combination of the poet and the talented woman became popular with countless handsome men and beautiful women, and almost became a big news in the country. Due to the achievements of his father Xu Shenru, Haining has become the only way to pass by the Shanghai-Hangzhou Railway. The portable transportation has brought many people into Haining. Xu Shenru's influence has connected Haining and Xiashi with the railway, making Haining and Xiashi It has become a hub of China's railways, especially a line on the Shanghai-Hangzhou line. And because of Xu Zhimo's poems, Haining was known to the world, and Haining's reputation for its outstanding places, numerous intellectuals, and the tidal waves of the Baili Qiantang River spread far and wide, making this Jiangnan hometown between Hangzhou and Shanghai full of people. A mysterious color. Perhaps Xu Zhimo did not know or realize this during his lifetime.

Walking into Xu Zhimo’s former residence and facing Xu Zhimo’s lifelike photos, I felt an inexplicable excitement in my heart. It was a kind of admiration for the poet’s contribution to the development of new poetry in our country. I don’t know whether I feel sorry for the poet’s short life or admire the rich emotional world in his heart. In that suffocating air, he got rid of the pale classical Chinese and boldly used the vernacular with a rebellious heart, creating an era of vernacular poetry and leading the development direction of modern new poetry. This is the eternal cultural wealth left by Xu Zhimo’s short life.

Xu Shenru used his wisdom to connect Haining with Shanghai and Hangzhou with two railway tracks, thus integrating into China's railway transportation network. And Xu Zhimo used the poetry culture of inner emotions to make Haining influence China, "waving his sleeves" and flying across the other side of the ocean, becoming the clouds in the west. From this I want to say: Zhimo, your influence is no less than that of my father.

I once studied modern Chinese literature courses, and they all said that Xu Zhimo was the founder of the magazine "Crescent Moon" of Chinese new poetry and the pioneer of Chinese bourgeois new poetry. This is Although this conclusion is marked by the times and has political overtones, it does objectively affirm Xu Zhimo's role in the Chinese poetry world. Nowadays, the poetry world, which has become indifferent to this kind of political color, has already achieved fruitful results. It cannot but be said that it is a kind of luck for literati that people's hearts and souls can fly freely between the lines.

The oil painting of Xu Zhimo on the wall with the Zhibiao Tower in Haining Dongshan as the background is the masterpiece of Haining painter Mr. Yang Dijiang. He studied Xu Zhimo’s life and life, especially Xu Zhimo’s overseas travels. When Hai came to study at the University of Cambridge in England, the theme was determined after careful conception: Xu Zhimo stood by the pool, the arch bridge and the temple behind him clearly complemented each other, the trees on the east mountain of Haining were lush, and the Zhibiao Tower towered into the clouds under the blue sky. A kind of life emotion and thoughts of loving life and pursuing love rippled on his face, and a trace of melancholy appeared in his confidence.

For Xu Zhimo’s life, it is a soul-stirring declaration of love, a kind of shackles of helplessness, or a kind of romantic and uninhibited romantic suaveness of a poet. Everyone will have their own opinions and opinions when it comes to judging and commenting, but I think that in today's society, no one needs to make unreasonable comments about Xu Zhimo. In fact, many modern studies and comments on Xu Zhimo are based on the subjective imagination of the commentators. They often determine the so-called theme first, and then look for bits and pieces of his life to prove their "academic" by stacking methods. Points of view, to fulfill one's own research dream, may be inconsistent with the facts, or may be contrary to Shima's own creed.

Just like when some writers become famous, many people comment on their writing skills by saying that the writer is amazing. Even a meaningless punctuation mark has thousands of good reasons, making the writer himself feel confused and amused. The writer may not have considered this at all when he wrote, it was just the critic's presumption.

After all, we are not Xu Zhimo himself. We will not understand and know his inner changes from moment to moment, so there is no need to give him a conclusion today, let alone use a conclusion to comment on the wonderfulness of a person. multi-faceted life. Xu Zhimo has his own life and his own way of living. He uses his unruly arrogance to live out his own personality and freedom, and lives out the colorful dream of a short life. When he and Lu Xiaoman fell in love at first sight, we cannot evaluate his marriage change from a secular perspective. The process of his marriage change was undoubtedly a flash of advanced cultural concepts. In modern language, it was a new pursuit, just like Just as his new poetry was a pioneer in the 1920s and 1930s, his marriage was also a pioneer. This was a betrayal of the old concept of marriage more than 80 years ago and was a treasonous sin. Just as his vernacular poetry was not popular among many People generally accept it. However, this surprising behavior is a step forward for young men and women to pursue the new concept of marriage in pursuit of freedom and happiness. With the changes of the times, this phenomenon has become commonplace in modern society, and people no longer use it for various reasons. Making accusations.

Of course, this kind of marriage change still required a certain amount of courage at the time, especially for a celebrity and a talented person who grew up in a well-regulated family. In China's semi-feudal background at that time, it was a sin. Xu Zhimo is a scholar. Pursuing happiness in life has become his ideal dream, but it was shot down by reality. However, he showed fearlessness and used actions to realize his dream. He completely went his own way, completely ignoring the opposition of his family, and completely refused to listen to the dissuasion of cultural celebrities in the same industry. He faced Mei's mother with an unaccommodating attitude and her husband Wang Geng's cold attitude, and even divorced Zhang Youyi, who was already pregnant. . This attitude is really a kind of courage, and it is admirable to cover up one's books and meditate.

Xu Zhimo has many dreams. He soars like a bird in his dreams. His pursuit of love makes Zhimo’s dreams use his own way at the intersection of life, spreading his wings to meet the pain and hardship. Challenge with the storm, can the dream come true, can love be spread to the world, where will Zhimo go?

He "went to Lingyin alone and lay straight on the stone slab under the Lei Lei Pavilion to dream. I deliberately covered my face with your little red silk, hoping that a beautiful girl would leave her soul and leave her behind. Come down to the Lei Pavilion and meet me!" "When I was in Italy, I had thoughts of God countless times. I either bit my arm hard or hit my chest with my fist. I didn't know it until it really hurt." The unrepentant infatuation was like a dream, and finally moved God to make Xu Zhimo's dream come true. Entered the palace of marriage with Lu Xiaoman.

Xu Zhimo’s father, Xu Shenru, firmly disagreed with his son marrying Lu Xiaoman. He felt that his son’s divorce would be a treason, and marrying Lu Xiaoman, who was divorced from Wang Geng, would be even more disgraceful to the family tradition. After the mediation of Hu Shi, Liu Haisu and others, Xu's father reluctantly agreed to his son's remarriage. But he proposed that the wedding must have Hu Shi as the introducer and Liang Qichao as the witness, otherwise it would not be recognized.

October 3, 1926 (the seventh day of the seventh lunar month) is the Chinese Valentine’s Day. The annual gathering of Dong Yong and the Seven Fairies on earth and in heaven is a beautiful time for lovers to have a romantic date. On this day, Xu Zhimo and Lu Xiaoman held a grand wedding in Beihai Park, Beijing. The witness Liang Qichao also left the only and unique speech at the wedding in Chinese history:

"It is to say a few unpleasant words so that the society will know that such evil examples are not justified, and more Not worthy of encouragement - Xu Zhimo, you have such an impetuous temperament that you are unable to achieve anything in learning, knowledge, and life. Your divorce and remarriage are proof of your incompetence!

Xiao! Man, you and Xu Zhimo are both experienced. I hope that from now on you can abide by the moral code of women and review your own personality and behavior. Divorce and remarriage are all caused by the fault of your character. I hope you will not make the same mistake again and again. people.

Don’t use selfishness as the guideline for acting, don’t use absurdity and enjoyment as the purpose of life pursuit, don’t treat marriage as a child’s play, thinking that you can get married if you are happy, divorce if you are unhappy, and make your parents ashamed. , make friends look down upon, and make society laugh at you! Anyway, I hope this is the last time you two get married! This is my congratulations to you! ——I'm done! ”

Liang Qichao’s wedding witness speech can be said to be unprecedented in history and unprecedented in history. I think the greatest contribution of this marriage witness speech is not to warn Xu Zhimo, nor to "Xu Zhimo" The reprimand is that it truly reflects the feudal ideology that existed in Chinese society at that time and restricted the freedom of marriage. It can be said that the cultural people who have accepted the influence of Western culture relatively early, such as the famous Chinese cultural scholars Wu Shi and Liang Qichao and others also had the same attitude towards Zhimo's second marriage.

Admittedly, modern society also has a lot of rhetoric about Liang Qichao's marriage testimony. At that time, Liang Qichao's son Liang Sicheng was in a relationship with Lin Huiyin. Talking about love, Xu Zhimo has a spark in his heart for the pure beauty Lin Huiyin that can set the whole world on fire, so Liang Qichao may be afraid that his love will overflow and he will get married again in the future, so he takes precautions against it.

Part 2

A new dream begins here

Standing in the wedding room of Xu Zhimo and Lu Xiaoman, we are used to testing the love between Xu Zhimo and Lu Xiaoman. Dream.

The pink furniture gives people a warm vision and creates a romantic atmosphere. It is the nest of their love and the place where Shimo’s romantic dreams come true. I don’t know. How inseparable were the two of them in the room, how openly and boldly they expressed their true feelings to each other, and how did the two of them discuss Liang Qichao's wedding speech to them on their wedding night, a warm and romantic speech full of warm tones? In the wedding room, how did Zhimo and Lu Xiaoman conflict in the days to come, and how did the fragrant room smell of opium, eventually causing a generation of beautiful and talented women to fall into opium? Is it a shame to be a slave?

Opposite the wedding room is Xu Zhimo’s study, which is named Meixuan. It also has pink furniture, especially the writing table. It seems to be tailor-made for Xiaoman and full of feminine colors. Sitting on it will create a state of unity between people and things. And Xu Zhimo sitting on it is really unacceptable. However, Xu Zhimo is in his own. In his newlywed dream, he was full of excitement about everything, and the color pink inspired his romance and passion. In the Meixuan room, he wrote the first romantic chapter of his honeymoon diary "Meixuan Miscellaneous Words". *** He was out of control, and his love letters and diaries to Xiaoman left more of Xu Zhimo’s deep love for Lu Xiaoman, leaving an eternal song in the cabin.

It is the practical result of Xu Zhimo's pursuit of his life and love dreams.

Walking up to the second floor, there is a mouthwash bowl and a 40-centimeter wash basin stored in the side room next to the stairs. It looks like blue and white porcelain from the Republic of China period. Unfortunately, this mouthwash bowl has been restored with a traditional Chinese copper nail bowl. From the outside, you can clearly see the two legs of the copper nails that resemble staples across the porcelain. The cracks go deep inside and join the two pieces of porcelain together.

My friend Gao Ershen told me that this was a vessel used by Xu Zhimo and Lu Xiaoman and was collected from Shanghai. In early May 2007, Mr. Zhang Jingshu, president of the Haining Celebrity Research Association, provided information that the famous Shanghai female writer Ding Yanzhao knew the whereabouts of two pieces of porcelain used by Xu Zhimo and Lu Xiaoman when they lived in Shanghai, and she was willing to introduce and help Haining Collected by the Municipal Museum for collection. After hearing the news, Gao Ershen, then director of the museum, Tan Jingyi and Mr. Zhang Jingshu, deputy directors of the Cultural Affairs Bureau, made a special trip to Shanghai to visit Ms. Ding Yanzhao on the 30th, and accompanied her to meet with Ms. Weng Xiangguang, an art collector.

Since Ding Yanzhao got involved in the study of modern Chinese literature in the 1970s, he has always been interested in writing biographies of modern cultural women and "talented women of the Republic of China". He once got acquainted with Weng Xiangguang through an interview and became a frequent visitor to her home. Weng Xiangguang was 88 years old and worked at the Shanghai High Court before retiring. His father Weng Ruiwu had a close relationship with Xu Zhimo and Lu Xiaoman in their early years, so he and Lu Xiaoman still had frequent contact after Xu Zhimo's death. Weng Xiangguang said that Xu Zhimo bought four pieces of "Oriental" porcelain from England in his early years. Two of them have been given away by Lu Xiaoman to others and their whereabouts are unknown. The two pieces of porcelain collected at home were given to his father by Lu Xiaoman and have been preserved to this day. The deposits on the porcelain are in foreign languages ??and should be made in Japan, but no final identification has been made.

Although the collection process was quite troublesome, after all, the items used by this famous poet during his lifetime were returned to the family. This can not but be said to be a gratifying thing, and for this reason, The hard-working Zhang Jingshu, Tan Jingyi, and Gao Ershen are indispensable.

Seeing things and thinking about people, I thought: Zhimo and Xiaoman are just like celadon. Although they have been scarred, they are still so bright and lovable.

Standing in the patio at the entrance of the gate, the colorful glass on the floor-to-ceiling hall window is inlaid in the middle of the window pane. It is said that the stained glass was imported from Italy and is also original. I don’t know if it’s true or not. Of course, it doesn’t matter whether it’s original or not. What’s worth remembering is the owner of this Western villa. He was in the prime of his life, but he disappeared from reality with the wind. . Now I am standing in that well, raising my head to look at the sky from that square space. The sun is shining brightly outside, and a few white clouds will float in the sky from time to time. This may have been a relatively luxurious expectation in recent years. . I can't help but wonder if Zhimo was like me, standing in the patio, admiring the white clouds, letting his thoughts fly with the white clouds, and thus created many popular poems - these can still be called The essence of poetry.

I am a cloud in the sky,

Occasionally projected in the center of your wave——

You don’t have to be surprised,

More No need to rejoice -

disappeared in an instant.

You and I met on the dark sea,

You have yours, I have mine, direction;

You may remember,

It is best that you forget,

The light that shines upon each other during this encounter.

The song "Accidental" makes boys and girls crazy.

Just like Zhimo's own state of mind, he likes the white clouds in the sky and lets his heart fly freely in the sky like clouds.

Three

Everyone has dreams and integrates their own ideals and artistic conception into consciousness. Zhimo is the same, always flying his dreams in his short life.

Xu Zhimo had many unremitting pursuits in his life. His romantic thoughts filled him with enthusiasm, hope and persistence for a new life, which also took a new step in the development of poetry. .

Dreams fly across my chest, hovering in the air but lingering in my heart.

November 19, 1931, that day when dreams were flying in the sky, made Zhimo eternal.

Lin Huiyin's speech became the motivation for Zhimo's trip. He dreamed that he could become a loyal listener and a devout admirer of this talented woman. Ten years of acquaintance have given them too many different languages ??and created indescribable emotions that are difficult for others to understand. Zhimo sent a telegram to Lin Weiyin, telling him that he was going to listen to her speech.

That night, he was so excited, maybe he was welcoming the rooster's crowing in his happy sleep. While the dream was still in his mind, he took the bus despite changing his booking three times. Take the postal plane and go to the place where the thoughts of beauty and happiness are always surging in your heart.

At nine o'clock in the morning on the 19th, Xu Zhimo sent another telegram to Lin Huiyin at Nanjing Airport, saying that he would arrive at Nanyuan on time at three o'clock in the afternoon and asked her to send a car to pick him up.

However, there was no news of a plane until 4:30 in the afternoon, which made people uneasy. What they finally got was the bad news that a plane crashed into a mountain in Jinan due to heavy fog.

"I will visit my only soul mate in the vast sea of ????people: I am lucky to find him, but I am not lucky, that is my fate"

On the plane, Zhimo still had a dream . The heavy rain pattered on the fuselage, but it was like Xu Zhimo's excited heartbeat. There was confusion outside the window. The haze in the sky could not stop his dream. He had his own direction, which was the scene of Lin Huiyin's speech. In the end, the plane kissed the mountain in the fog, and Zhimo's heart retained the beautiful scene of the speech, and he gained eternal life in his dream.

Zhimo, your dream is an eternal dream. Standing in the background at that time and from your perspective, you can clearly see your innocence and enthusiasm for your friends. I understand your mood and your emotional pursuit. I don’t want to comment on your dream for fear of waking you up from your sweet dream.

Zhimo has a dream, and the dream has telepathy. His good friend Lin Weiyin of the opposite sex also has a dream.

After Zhimo's accident, Lin Huiyin said sadly in her article "Mourn for Zhimo": "Zhimo, my friend, death is just a new journey. We have never been there, so we will inevitably If you are too suspicious, death will be more difficult than this life. "We cannot easily conclude that there is no sunshine and human kindness on the other side." But as I said before, it is embarrassing to remember the silence...I will miss you a lot from now on. I am afraid that life will be full of dim pain, without any light, unless I also have your beautiful poetic faith." A confession from the depths of the heart expresses the deep love between Lin Huiyin and Xu Zhimo. This is a heartfelt and sincere expression between friends. We don’t need to use too much thought to consider the relationship between the two, as long as we understand it.

On the fourth anniversary of Zhimo's death, Lin Huiyin wrote in his thoughts: "Last year today I unexpectedly passed by your hometown. In the gloomy night, I stood outside the train door and stared at the gloomy scenery. Standing on the platform, silently recalling many discontinuous fragments of the past... If my tears had involuntarily overflowed from my eyelashes at that time, I know you would forgive me."

Zhimo will understand her. The connotation of dreams, perhaps, the soul and dreams are always together.

Four

At the foot of the West Mountain in Haining City, Xu Zhimo’s tomb is among the trees on this hillside. As a native of Haining, I feel very sorry for Xu Zhimo. I am also happy to have such an outstanding poet. I have visited the poet Xu Zhimo many times, looking for his poetic soul in front of his tombstone, and missing this fellow who made great contributions to Chinese poetry. This is where the soul belongs and where dreams live. I know that Zhimo’s dreams have also settled here.

Shima’s tomb is a burial mound that was moved from Higashiyama. Xu Zhimo died in a plane crash in Jinan, Shandong Province on November 19, 1931. After his coffin was transported back to Haining in 1932, his family buried him in Wanshiwo, Dongshan, Xiashi Town, Haining County. His father Xu Shenru asked local craftsmen to build the tomb, and Wu Shi wrote the tombstone "The Tomb of the Poet Xu Zhimo". In 1946, the famous calligrapher Zhang Zongxiang re-inscribed the tombstone for Xu Zhimo's tomb.

Every year on his death anniversary, many fans of Xu Zhimo’s poetry at home and abroad will go there to pay their respects.

According to Wu Linghua, Xu Zhimo’s cousin and the daughter of the famous scholar Wu Qichang, there is a square stone tablet next to Xu Zhimo’s tomb in Dongshan, with Xu Zhimo’s confidante and talented woman Ling Shuhua inscribed on it. "The cold moon illuminates the soul of poetry." It is a pity that the changes of the years have made the stone tablet "Cold Moon Shines on the Soul of Poetry" long gone, and it only remains in people's memory.

Ling Shuhua, an outstanding woman, a confidant of the opposite sex who left traces in Xu Zhimo’s dreams, once shone brightly in Xu Zhimo’s life. In modern times, some people interpret Xu Zhimo's life as a story about a man and three women, which makes people feel indignant.

Not to mention that the researcher did not understand Zhimo's personality, but only saw the appearance of his interactions with girls, so he blindly used a secular perspective to figure out his thoughts, and regarded the pure interactions between men and women as a man's ulterior motives. , is a romantic affair that was based on a change of ideas. It does not analyze and study Zhimo’s true feelings, kind wishes, and beautiful pursuits in the context of the time, let alone Zhimo’s pursuit of his own human freedom and rebellion against feudal society. It must be said that It is a kind of research wearing colored glasses. Ling Shuhua is the fourth woman who appears in Zhimo's life. In his mind, she can be compared with Lin Huiyin, and perhaps to some extent, she has more emotion and trust than Lin Huiyin.

Xu Zhimo admired Ling Shuhua's talent and personality very much. He always had a dream in his relationship with Ling Shuhua. He used his absolute trust in her to twice turn his "eight" The "treasure box" was left in Ling Shuhua's place for her to keep, but inside the "eight treasure box" were his love diary and secrets, as well as his intoxicating dreams. This kind of trust has exceeded people's conventional understanding. How pure is it? It was a kind of trust that was so sincere that it could make people suffocate, and a kind of honest feeling, because he realized that "only L is the only true friend who is beneficial."

Ling Shuhua's first novel " When "Flower Temple" came out, Xu Zhimo happily wrote a preface for her. This was the only time in his life that he wrote a preface for someone else. It can be said that Xu Zhimo safely handed over his love diary and one hundred and twenty of his secrets to Ling Shuhua, just like putting his heart in a transparent glass bottle and sending it to Ling Shuhua. This is Xu Zhimo's dream in life. The most wonderful stroke has also left the world with the most touching and beautiful legend among friends of the opposite sex. Of course, if you savor it carefully, it is still a mystery in Shimo's life.

It can be said that in the vast world, Xu Zhimo kept his dream beside Ling Shuhua, but he was floating in the wind, looking for the eternal space and fixing it in the eternity of history.

During the Qingming Dynasty in 1933, when Lu Xiaoman came to visit Zhimo’s grave at Wanshiwo in Dongshan, Haining, he left behind a poem filled with mixed emotions: “A broken-hearted person still feels the music, and this heart has been sent to Yunqiao for a long time. In recent years, I have learned more about the famine. "The cold smell, the lake and the mountains are always lonely."

During the Cultural Revolution, Xu Zhimo's grave was not spared. One night in 1966, Xu Zhimo's grave was bombed. Fortunately, the tombstone was moved by others. It was used to build stone pier steps by the river, so that it can be preserved intact.

In 1983, the Haining City Government rebuilt the tomb of Xu Zhimo and invited Mr. Chen Congzhou to take charge of the tomb in Xiashi. He asked him to redraw the drawings and reburied it at the foot of the Western Mountain. The shape and size of the tomb is similar to that of the original tomb, but the bones have long since disappeared. There is only a copy of "Xu Zhimo Chronicle" in the tomb. The epitaph was inscribed by Chen Congzhou, written by Jiang Qiting, and in Wang Yuntian seal script. It is now erected in front of his tombstone.

The Xu Zhimo Poetry Festival has been held in Haining for several times. Poets from all over the world use poetry to recall his artistic conception and feel the beauty of poetry. Many times, during morning exercises, I walked up to the Western Mountains, often to remember this outstanding poet. The trees at the foot of the mountain were lush and green, and the silence in front of the tomb remained the same, except for the addition of wreaths from some poetry lovers in memory of the poet.

I bow deeply to the poet to commemorate this famous poet from my hometown.

The soul returns to the dream and rests in peace. Zhimo, I don’t want to disturb your dream.