1. Ever since people tanned their faces and looked better, their teeth have become whiter and they no longer blush when drinking alcohol.

2. Why do more and more couples no longer want children? Because the leaders from above said: Start with babies.

3. If there is a next life, I must be your heart, because if I don’t beat it, you will die.

4. In spite of thousands of rivers and mountains, can you always give me some points? There is true love in the world, and giving it a perfect score is also love!

5. Those who cannot unscrew the bottle cap are all married, while those who can unscrew it are still doing it by themselves.

6. Your altitude is too high and I still won’t be able to climb it.

7. The biggest lie every day is: Go to bed early today and get up early tomorrow.

8. The more you live, the less you look like yourself.

9. The world is so big, where can you go if you have no money? Go buy a globe so that you can not only look at it but also spin it around.

10. Every awesome person has a period of youth.

11. There is a monkey in the zoo that is so ugly that everyone vomits it! The next day I went to see him and I vomited! On the third day you went and the monkey vomited!

12. Can you be my boyfriend? If it’s okay, I’ll think of a way.

Thirteen, what’s on my face is definitely not acne, it’s youth.

14. Don’t smile at your phone at home. Your parents will think you are in love.

15. There is no such thing as love at first sight. The so-called love at first sight is just when you meet the person you have always wanted. people you meet.

16. Don’t pay attention to me so that I can’t dodge.

17. The most considerate thing for you is that your shoes are not dirty. It is because the road you walk is not clean.

18. When I don’t like to talk, you must know that your little Gongju is emotional again.

19. Wu Bai and I are not familiar with each other, but his younger brother Erbai Wu is very familiar with me.

20. Although I am often beaten by my wife, God can tell that my wife is not an unreasonable person. Every time before she hits me, she asks for my permission. If I say I don't agree, she hits me until I agree.

21. You have messed up my heart. When will you mess up my bed?

22. I am really grateful to those who once hit me and taught me how to hit others.

23. The reason why I am so carefree now is because I was more attentive than anyone else back then.

24. When others praise me, I worry that they do not praise me enough.

25. The night gave me a pair of black eyes, but I used them to roll my eyes.

26. Count the stars with me. If you have a low IQ, just count the moon!

Twenty-seven, you are now naive to the power of two.

28. You have to be patient to see how durable I am.

Twenty-nine, I am always lost in the long road of life.

Thirty. Only my fat body can carry my heavy soul.

31. If no one in the world wants you in the future, you must remember that there is still me and I don’t want you.

Thirty-two. If you shout a bitch on the street, you will definitely turn around more than calling a beautiful woman!

Thirty-three, it is better to study when you are sober and confused. Sleep when angry.

Thirty-four. Is the departure of the stool due to the unrestrained butt or the pursuit of the toilet.

Thirty-five. In fact, I am a homebody. It’s just a matter of whose home I live in.

36. There is a kind of people in the world who are looking for food besides eating.

Thirty-seven. I still hate that you are like the neighbor who ate Sichuan peppercorns and numbed the next door.

Thirty-eight, I am a lonely island, who is the tide that cannot get ashore.

Thirty-nine, I don’t even believe your words. The most humorous words to amuse your girlfriend

The most humorous words to amuse your girlfriend

1. That is your business, not mine. I have to create my future career and ideals myself!

2. If the haze in my heart cannot be relieved, then I will never be able to gain frankness and freedom.

3. You know, holding this thread in your hands is like a constant fate, pulling each other.

4. If you feel like crying, stand on your head. In this way, the tears that were originally meant to be shed will not be shed. Have you learned this?

5. Let me wander with you in the sea, just to be an oar in your hand, no matter how big the wind and waves are, No matter how thick the wind and rain are, you will always have me by your side.

6. Everyone should have a pair of good shoes, because these good shoes will take you to the most beautiful places.

7. For a man as elegant as me, what else do you think about?

8. An inexplicable pain grips my heart tightly.

9. In fact, I felt that I fell in love with him several times.

10. I miss you countless nights, and think of the unforgettable nights with you. I pray to the shooting stars that I can meet you in the next life and fall in love with you until the end of the world!

11. You can't even walk well, you are a pig, I have to hold my hand!

12. I can only believe now that the pain in my heart will slowly subside one day.

13. Just leave yourself to me, just leave it to me...

14. He is still so young and there are countless possibilities in his life. Why do you Must we make a decision for him at this time?

15. That rainy night, my heart was broken.

16. Love is not reciprocated because there is no persistence.

17. Tell me what I should do to continue to love you.

18. I don’t know whether love will fade away, just because I don’t know, so I have to find my own answer!

19. The feeling of flying a kite is like facing A very distant object, looking at it from a distance, although the distance is very far, but my heart will never despair.

20. I want you to know that as long as you run away, I will definitely chase you. No matter where you are, even in hell, I will chase you!

21. Before that meteor falls, if it is seen by lovers in the world, they will be tightly locked up.

22. The first time I saw his child-like innocent smile, even a small biscuit can make him so moved...

23. Happiness, I I also want to be happy.

24. Can you lend me your back?

25. Love is just an illusion.

26. Love is programmed in human genes to change from strong to weak after three years.

27. I can’t live like a normal person. If you leave me, I don’t know what my life will be like!

28. “If I love you only you Where do you love one-tenth of me?" "Then I will make up for the remaining nine." 29. In fact, only when you are with me will you be truly happy.

30. Don’t go with him, I can’t live without you.

31. I like him, I like him. In fact, I wanted to tell him that I like him a long time ago!

32. You must be thinking about me now. .

33. Do you know? I can't live without her. Without her, I won't even have the strength to breathe.

34. A friend told me that at dawn, angels will worship God together. If you light fireworks at this time, they will be attracted, and their wishes will be especially easy to come true.

35. My whole body hurts so much, but why is there a trace of sweetness and happiness in my heart?

36. Gorgeous clothes and beautiful hair , it is no longer so important to me. From now on, I will be myself.

37. You stupid woman!

38. I am overwhelmed by the invisible shadow. The more I try to escape, the more my life will become a mess.

39. This cold rain falls on a dark night. Maybe I can say the word breakup in this night.

40. You are doing gymnastics while talking on the phone, you are an idiot.

41. I don’t care what others think of me, I just want you to believe in me!

42. Because I like you, I really like you!

43. You stupid woman! Do you think it’s funny?

44. I will never give in.

45. Because at that time I only had one thought in my mind, which was to protect you. If I die like this, don’t be sad or cry!

46. I’m not crying because I'm sad because I cried with joy.

47. If apologizing is useful, why do we need the police?

48. Why should we give up? If I could give up, I would have done it when we first broke up. gave up.

49. Don’t run away from me anymore, let us face the problem together. I will always stand in front of you.

50. I like you, let’s date. Humorous sentences, the most humorous sentence

1. I hate myself a little now. No matter how hard I try, I am only a beauty in the eyes of others. ?

2. If a girl says she's cold, just hug her. There's no chance you'll have a girlfriend.

3. I hope you don't feel like you are worthless. You can at least make others feel annoying.

4. Mathematics is very interesting. How interesting is it? Since I learned mathematics, I feel that even life is meaningless.

5. Be my girlfriend, I am willing to work for you, as long as you give me grass.

6. When I get angry, I want to buy something. When I buy something, I have to spend money. When I spend money, I get less money. When I get less money, I get angry.

7. How to elegantly explain that I am fat and have many things on my mind, and it is not easy to lose weight?

8. The father was busy at work during the day, and after picking up the child from get off work, he immediately played games online. The mother couldn't bear it anymore and exploded, scolding: "Play for fun, play every day, when will you find out that the child is not your biological child." Dad heard this: I have suspected it for a long time, and you finally dare to admit it. Mom: Why don’t I dare to admit it? Go to the living room and see if the boy you picked up from kindergarten is your son!

9. Even though I'm not good at math, I still write my domineering solutions on my homework.

10. The iPhone

11. I'll start with my ugly words. If you're not my boyfriend, don't blame me for being your girlfriend.

12． If a boy's mobile phone wallpaper is you and all social passwords are told to you, then you just take his money and go.

13. Life will get better and better, and my future boyfriend will become more and more handsome.

14. When I'm at home, I still keep surfing the Internet when I have a fever. When I'm at school, I feel like I have terminal cancer even when I sneeze.

15. I feel very painful when you leave, and I will be the only one smelling the farts from now on.

16. If you can't control your mouth and lose weight this winter, you will have a very special and foreign English name of Fei De Yuan Bu Long Winter.

17. Why do you still require mobile phones to have high pixels? Do you still think you are ugly and not clear enough?

18． When you are in a relationship, you should give way to your boyfriend in everything, let him cook, wash dishes, wash clothes, and make money.

19. If you think the person you like also likes you, it only means that you have a rich imagination.

20. If you don't reply to my message, you are just a stinky pig. It's normal for me not to reply to your message. Which fairy is not busy?

21. I really want to care about you, but you are always sick. I really want to cry for you, but why don't you die?

22. Being in the midst of blessings and not knowing the blessings means that some people have gained weight but pretend not to know it.

23. Do you think this is the low point of your life? In fact, you still have a lot of room to fall.

24. A buddy said to his wife: Wife, I have a fortune teller, and the fortune teller said that I will have a hard time when I am 135 years old! His wife said coldly: What? Did someone dig up the grave? Humorous words

1. I really want to treat you to dinner, but the water supply is cut off during the day and the electricity is cut off at night. I cannot pay wages and cannot afford bread. I opened Deng’s Theory to find the answer: It turns out that this is the primary stage of socialism. The last translation: His grandma, it will not change for a hundred years! Why should I treat you to dinner?

2. The story of "The Fairy Match" tells the story of "Dong Yong riding a fairy"!

3. I really don’t know if today’s games are for people to play or to play with people.

4. If you want to gain, you have to pay. If you want to win 5 million, you have to spend 2 yuan.

5. How do you, who are in heat, and me, who are heartless, face this ruthless world?

6. The most charming person is Master Kong. Thousands of people follow him every day.

7. There are photos inside, please do not open it!

8. Wandering between forgiveness and despair, the only feeling is hurt! hurt! ! hurt! ! !

9. Who takes whom seriously and who feels sorry for whom.

10. Life cannot be like cooking, where you have to prepare all the ingredients before cooking.

11. People who are usually willing to stay and argue with you are the ones who truly love you!

12. It turns out that forever is just a misunderstanding.

13. There is no other half with 100 points, only two people with 50 points!

14. The similarities between me and my father are different.

15. I have no acting skills in emotional dramas.

16. Others have a background, but I only have a back view~~.

17. If one drop of water falls from the sky, it is the tears I shed because I miss you; if two drops of water fall from the sky, it is the tears I shed because I love you; if there are countless drops of water falling from the sky, it is... ...Stop thinking, it’s raining!

18. Are you tired? Just be tired, comfort is reserved for the dead.

19. There is nothing that can’t be overcome, it’s just that you can never go back.

20. Women have two mouths, one mouth tells right and wrong, and the other mouth can eat people.

21. One day, I dreamed that I had spent all my money. When I woke up, my pocket was really empty...

22. Money is not everything. , sometimes you still need to use a credit card...

23. There is no rehearsal in life, every day is a live broadcast; not only the ratings are low, but the salary is not high.

24. Happiness is to find a warm person to spend your whole life.

Twenty-five, sincerity is the closest to sadness.

Twenty-six, I don’t want to hit you anymore. You go to the zoo to see if there is a suitable job for you. You can easily be shot if you run around on the street like this.

27. Since the space music was replaced by anxiety, I have found that there are fewer and fewer people running the hall.

Twenty-eight, I ordered two dishes from the canteen at noon. After eating the first one, I was shocked, "Is there any more unpalatable dish in the world than this?" After eating the second one, I cried, "There really is."

29. A person is not alone, only when he wants to be alone is he lonely.

Thirty. When I was having dinner with a friend, my friend gave me a bullwhip and told me to eat whatever I wanted to make up for it. I suddenly realized that I looked back at my butt and said sadly: "I ate too many chicken buttholes when I was a kid!"