Jokes are a form of artistic expression, expressing emotions in an obscure way. Below I have carefully compiled some jokes that will make you laugh until your stomach hurts. I hope it can help you!

1. Every time I see those middle school students and high school students falling in love, I will advise them: Children, there is still a long way to go in life. You are at this age when you are studying. When you are young, don't learn those bad habits. It's not too late to talk about it when you are as old as your uncle. Listen to your uncle and give them to us first, okay?

2. It doesn’t matter how much you earn, knowing how to save is the king.

A joke? Your monthly salary is a little over 20,000. ?I looked at the ?3000.00? on the pay slip and said.

Interpretation of self-deprecation is self-deprecation. In our country, there are many people with a monthly salary of 3,000 yuan. In fact, if you take good care of it, the savings in the passbook may really turn into "a little more than 20,000 yuan" very quickly. Rongtong e-loan financial planners suggest that working-class people with average incomes should pay more attention to increasing income and reducing expenditures when managing assets, and should not become "money earners" or "card slaves" just because of low wages. After your salary is paid every month, set aside enough money for your daily expenses and emergency reserves, and use the rest for mandatory savings or fixed investment in funds. After saving enough for one or two years, you can make some stable investments, such as monetary funds, treasury bonds, bill financial management, etc. In short, wealth accumulation is important for low-income earners.

3. Accounting for your husband? Confiscate your salary card

One day, I was gossiping with a group of stock traders and talked about private money. When everyone was lamenting that no matter what, they would be discovered by the other party, a The uncle said: "I deposit everything in the bank." Everyone asked: "What about the passbook or card?" The uncle smiled honestly: "Burn it and get the ID card to replace it when you need to use it." ?

Interpretation: Respect and trust are the most fundamental cornerstones of maintaining relationships in marriage and family. In many families, the biggest motivation for husbands to allow their wives to manage accounts is based on love, so wives should also control the intensity of management. Rongtong e-loan financial planner said that just because a wife manages money for her husband, it does not mean that she must take care of his salary card. First of all, it is necessary for both parties to pay equally and establish a separate account. This approach effectively prevents family assets from being transferred and used without the other party knowing anything about it. Secondly, you can use the bank's fund aggregation business, that is, the funds in the associated account are regularly collected into the main account according to a preset method. In this way, even if a salary card is not collected, part of the man's income can be automatically transferred to the company on a regular basis* **Account. At the same time, it can guide the husband to use credit card consumption, understand his basic consumption habits through bill information, and form a more targeted management plan.

The most popular financial jokes in 2017

4. What should I do if I see a female client bathing naked?

A world-famous hotel is recruiting a manager and I have come to apply. There were so many people that the boss wanted to test them: One day when you walked into the guest's room, you found a female guest bathing naked. What should you do?

Everyone raised their hands and rushed to answer. Some said, "I'm sorry, miss, I didn't mean it." ?Some said, ?Miss, I didn’t see anything. ? The boss kept shaking his head after hearing this.

At this time, a handsome young man said something and was hired on the spot. Dear friend, do you know what he said?

Answer: The handsome young man said: Sorry, sir! Excuse me.

Analysis of the answer: This answer captured the psychology of the guest. The guest was obviously a woman, but the manager said: Sir, what would the guest think? He must have thought that the manager did not see her clearly, so in his heart There is a sense of joy and face is saved; what hotel managers want is someone who can grasp the psychology of users, so that they can perform well and communicate well with users.

5. A few days ago, I saw my ex saying he wanted an iPhone 5 in the space, so I actively ordered one for him on Taobao. . . Then I saw what he said today? Who ordered the i5 for me, or cash on delivery? No matter how I explained to my mother, she didn’t believe I didn’t order it!!? I know her mother is a Taekwondo coach, no Do you know if he was killed?

6. Little A, a bank teller, became a vegetative state after suffering a car accident. Doctors said his chance of survival was only one in 10,000, and his hope of awakening was even slimmer.

But his family did not give up. Based on Little A’s hobbies, they called out to him every day: “Save money, save money!” A miracle finally happened. Little A woke up and his first words were: “Hello, may I ask?” How can I help you?

7. Xiao B, the bank account manager, was in a vegetative state after a car accident. The doctor said the hope of survival was only one in 10,000, and the chance of awakening was even slimmer. His leadership colleagues and relatives did not give up. Based on Little B’s spirit of working overtime every day to write reports, they read to him every day: The credit has been approved and is waiting for your signature to activate it. ?A miracle finally happened. Little B woke up. His first words were: ?How much was approved? Did you cut off my quota?

8. After the death of a beautiful bank account manager, he drank tea with God, God He thought she was too eloquent and would disturb the tranquility of heaven, so he sent her to hell.

Just a week later, the King of Hell came to the door sweating profusely and said: "God, please take her away quickly."

God asked: "What's going on?"

The King of Hell said: "The little devils in hell have been activated by him. They hold morning meetings every day, talk about dreams, development plans, and jump into teams." Dance, get satisfaction. No one listened to what I said. He asked me to do the organizational structure, work flow, goal setting, salary design, and performance appraisal. Underground workers should also pay attention to their image, improve their service skills, and satisfy everyone. ?

God was furious: Let him go to heaven and see how I deal with him.

A month later, the King of Hell met God and asked: "God, how did you deal with that account manager?"

God stopped and replied: "You made a mistake." Three mistakes, first, you should call me manager! Second, there is no God in this world, only customers are God! Third, I don’t have time to chat with you, I have to make a report. ?

The latest financial jokes in 2017

1: I changed my job this year and it’s my first day at work today. My mother got up early to prepare breakfast. When I finished my breakfast and was ready to go out, , my mother gave me a red envelope and said that it is auspicious to go to work on the first day of the new year. I was in a hurry to go to work and put it in my pocket without looking carefully. When I was free at work, I took out the red envelope and found that there was only a note in the red envelope with four big words written on it: Work hard?

2: My best friend’s mother is very superstitious. After her mother went to the mahjong parlor several times, her mother could win money every time, so whenever her mother went to play mahjong during the winter vacation, she would take her with her. Until yesterday when her best friend started school, and her mother sent her away, she burst into tears. I said to my best friend: Baby, this is the first time I am reluctant to leave you~

3: I took a taxi to the company to work in the morning and chatted with the taxi driver. When talking about the current relationship between men and women, the driver said He said this sentence, if there was any discord between men and women in the past, they would change. If there is discord now, they would change. I was speechless after hearing this.