My good friend Deng Zi's husband is like this: He had an affair with a married female colleague and agreed to divorce separately and set up a new family. But it was not until his colleagues got a clean divorce that he beat the drums and refused to divorce. G.E.M.'s husband is not an isolated case. Some men have had more than a dozen affairs outside, but they still don't cooperate with divorce, and even bite back when women explicitly ask for divorce. Men who cheat are everywhere. After the affair, there are only a handful of people who want a divorce. Similarly, they only like to steal food and don't like to wipe their mouths. Psychological state is very simple, nothing more than the following three.
02. Unwilling to divorce from his wife's assets. For women, the most difficult thing is emotional abandonment, but for men, the most difficult thing is the division of assets. Soviet writer Sergenko once said: "Before deciding to divorce, there is a long, sad and difficult whole process of thinking about the reasons, that is, the whole process of clearly putting forward the basis of one's decision from the perspective of personal needs, rights, views and values." Judging from personal needs, rights and values, divorce is not the best choice. In fact, in marriage, most men are more practical and snobbish than women. They don't want a divorce, probably because they are afraid of getting their wife's assets.
Don't believe the lie "I'm having an affair, but I still love you". Wake up, they just don't want to give you half of their assets. Unwilling to give up their houses, vehicles and savings, they are unwilling and unwilling. Writer Yu Dafu once said: "The life of middle-aged and elderly people is motionless, just like a stone rolling down a mountain, which hurts people." When people reach middle age, they just want to enjoy the freedom of wealth. Once divorced, he will "return to before liberation overnight". How could he want to? Their wishful thinking is fine, and they are much more rational than women.
Moreover, most families are dominated by men and women, so men think that the capital at home is created by themselves. Women look after the children at home, wash clothes and pants and cook a meal, so they get half of the assets? No way. Amazon founder Bezos divorced his predecessor and got 240 billion yuan. Many smelly hanging springs sarcastically said that Bezos suffered heavy losses and "sky-high divorce" was not cost-effective. They are more heartbroken than Bezos, as if this 240 billion yuan is their money. Although this view is paranoid, it also reflects the mentality of the vast majority of men.
03. If you don't have the heart to hurt your child, if the rich divorce is still a serious loss, the average man can't afford to divorce, and he can't afford it. The house was separated. Where do you live? Do you want to sleep on the street with your lover? The most important thing is the children. The child was taken away by his wife and then started a family. Their own blood needs to call someone else's father, which they can't afford. Even if we win custody of the children, who will take care of them? Is it necessary to spend a penny on a nanny? Not long ago, the quadruplet ice god in "Youth has You" was exposed that a third party had intervened in other people's divorce, so she defended her derailed husband: although he was not a good husband, he was a good father.
This applies to most men who cheat. The oral language of many men who are having an affair is: the daughter-in-law can be changed and the child will always be their own. As long as it is fully considered that divorce will make the child lose his complete home, cause great mental harm to the child and may lose the custody of the child, then the man who hurts his blood will be afraid of divorce. Men are the most thoughtful, no matter how extravagant they are outside, they will honestly enter the role of a good father when they get home. In these respects, they are born to be big winners in movies.