After reading "The Weakness of Human Nature" (1): After reading Dale Carnegie's "The Weakness of Human Nature", I deeply feel that Carnegie's thinking is too broad and kind, just like sitting in front of you and tirelessly telling you stories that happened around him. In the interpersonal relationship he described, everything that can happen between people, whether it is ordinary greetings, direct conflicts or business negotiations, is simple and ingenious, and can be solved under the condition of per capita income without being bound by hard and fast rules. I think it would be perfect if you could handle your life as Carnegie said. But after reading it, there is indeed a lot of inspiration. Personality is just some small examples and stories, which make people benefit a lot.
The fifth book, How to Persuade Others Better, left a deep impression on me, telling us that we should first praise and sincerely appreciate others, indirectly and tactfully point out their mistakes, and others always blame others for their poor work. Think about your own mistakes first, replace orders with questions, learn to motivate others to succeed, "put on a hat" and encourage others to correct their mistakes. This is what the other party is willing to do.
Mr. Carnegie said, "Instead of blaming others, try to understand them, which will be more effective than criticism." Think about it. I often yell angrily because students often delay or even fail to finish their homework: "If you can't finish your homework normally, can you learn math well?" If you don't study well, what are the prospects? ..... I didn't expect the child's heart might be crying blood? Children's attention is distracted in class, and the quality of homework is declining. I didn't really go in and seriously understand the reasons ... "Teacher's love", "for the development of students" and "into children's hearts" ...
I have read these fashionable words more than once, listened to them countless times, said them countless times, and practiced them vigorously. However, they have never really felt their existence and benefits like today! "the weakness of human nature" mentioned: give you sincere appreciation. Fish needs food, so why not catch someone who appreciates it as well? We should all learn to appreciate and encourage students to make progress. Personality phrase
Carnegie also said, "Even if others make mistakes, we are right. If we don't save face for others, we will ruin a person. Indeed, when students make mistakes in public, if you scold them loudly without face, they will lose face and they will not believe you. Give him face at this time, and his eyes will work later. How important it is to save other people's face, but we seldom think about it. Sometimes we only consider our own feelings and those of others, which leads to a lot of unhappiness. If we can think for a few more minutes and put ourselves in others' shoes, there will be no unpleasant scenes and people will be more grateful and trusting.
The vivid and concise examples in the book "The Weakness of Human Nature" have made me realize a lot of truth. With this passion, I will be more energetic and full in my future work and life. I think it is precisely because human nature is indeed full of weaknesses, and there are weaknesses in human nature that we can expect tomorrow to be better and more perfect.
Reflection on "The Weakness of Human Nature" (2): I saw an article in "The Weakness of Human Nature" and felt a lot. Understanding and true feelings are both lacking in interpersonal communication at present, and it is this kind of feeling that needs to be cultivated.
Remind one sentence, repeat one sentence, the purpose is to correct some mistakes, but will the object of reminding and speaking be the same? But as a father, I will still take great pains-nothing-because this is my child.
Listen, son, I have something to say to you, even though you are sleeping at the moment. Your cheek is pressing against one of your little palms, your forehead is sweating slightly, and your curly blond hair is stuck to it. I sneaked into your room quietly, because I was constantly condemned when I was reading the newspaper in the study just now, so I finally came to your bed with guilt.
I think a lot, son. I often lose my temper with you. After getting dressed in the morning, wipe your face with a towel at will. I blame you. I blame you for not shining your shoes; Seeing you throw things around, I shouted at you even more angrily.
The same is true at breakfast. I often scold you for knocking things over, not eating slowly, putting your arms on the table, smearing too much cream and so on. When you leave the table and are ready to play, I will go out, too. You turn around, wave your little hand and shout, "goodbye, dad!" " "I replied with a frown:" Stand up straight! "
At night, the situation is still the same. I was walking on the road, secretly observing you, and I saw you kneeling on the ground playing with glass marbles, and your stockings were worn out. I ignored your face and ordered you to go home in front of other children, yelling at you: "Silk stockings are very expensive, so you should save wearing them!" " "Think about it, son, as your father, I am like this!
Remember? Just now, I was reading a newspaper in my study. You came timidly and stood at the door with a frightened look in your eyes. I looked up from the newspaper and shouted impatiently, "What do you want?"
You didn't say a word. You just ran quickly and put your arms around my neck and kissed me. The strength of your forearm shows a kind of love that God has planted in your heart, and no indifference can make it wither. After you kissed me, you left and ran upstairs.
Son, at that moment, the newspaper slipped from my hand and I suddenly felt scared. How did I form bad habits! The habit of finding fault and shouting-that's how I treat a little boy! Son, it's not that I don't love you, it's just that I expect too much from you and unconsciously measure you by my age.
In fact, there are many advantages in your nature. Your little heart is as beautiful as the sun just rising from the mountain, which can be seen from your childish and desperate action of running over and kissing good night. Son, nothing else matters tonight. I knelt by your bed in the dark to show you my inner guilt!
I know, this is a kind of atonement without power. You may not understand what I'm saying. However, starting from tomorrow, I will seriously be a real father! I want to be good friends with you. When you are in pain, I will accompany you in pain, and when you are happy, I will laugh with you. I remind myself every day: "He is just a child-a little boy!" " "
I really shouldn't treat you like an adult, son. Just like this moment, I see you curled up in bed tired, completely like a baby. I remember yesterday when you were lying in your mother's arms with your head on her shoulder. I ask too much.
Reflections on the weakness of human nature (3): This holiday, I read the book "The Weakness of Human Nature" written by Dale Carnegie, who is called "the greatest spiritual mentor in the 20th century". Browsing most chapters, reading some materials carefully, I am deeply touched, and I would like to share with you here.
Dale Carnegie is an American writer, and The Weakness of Human Nature is his most successful inspirational classic. In this work, he used the knowledge of sociology and psychology to deeply discuss and analyze human nature. This work comes from a short speech. After 15 years of experiments and research, it has been continuously expanded and become such a book deeply loved by adults. It tells us how to understand people, how to get along with people, how to make others like you, how to make ourselves successful and so on. The Carnegie Foundation has done a survey before, and the research shows that less than 15% of a person's high salary is due to his technical knowledge, while the other 85% is due to his interpersonal communication, that is, his personal qualities and talents. Therefore, Carnegie believes that the biggest purpose of education is not to impart knowledge, but to teach people to act. The Weakness of Human Nature is a book that teaches people to act.
Reading this book, I am often assimilated by the author's point of view. For example, the author thinks that it is not good to use "criticism" frequently in interpersonal communication, because no matter what anyone has done wrong, no matter how serious his mistake is, he will not blame himself in most cases. This is the weakness of human nature. Therefore, truly wise people will not simply criticize each other, but try to understand each other and find out why they want to do that. No one can easily understand other people's criticism, but almost everyone will criticize others, but the superior criticizes the subordinate in person and the subordinate criticizes the superior behind his back, but no matter what form of criticism, it will bring discomfort to people.
So how to avoid discomfort? Carnegie said in the book, the scientist Darwin's method: (Darwin knew when he wrote the theory of evolution that he would be attacked by religious circles) It is not good to wait for others to criticize us or our work. We should be our harshest critics, and we should find out our weaknesses and improve them before others have a chance to accuse us. To be your harshest critic is to criticize yourself. In the current language, it is necessary to constantly reflect on your own behavior, find out what you have not done enough, and improve before others find out. Reflect more and make fewer mistakes; Make fewer mistakes, be less criticized by others, be less hurt, and be more happy, so as to form a virtuous circle and have fun every day.
Carnegie also believes that the first element of success is to love your job or do what you like. Looking back on my teaching experience for half a year, I chose teaching as a career because I like it. Now that you have chosen, you should be responsible for this job, assume the responsibility of a teacher, and be worthy of entrusting your children to your parents. No matter how tired you are, you must keep going. It's no use being negative and complaining, it will only bring me endless troubles. So half a teacher's career left me many perfect memories. I must be happy, because I have mastered the first element of success.
This book has taught me some basic principles of life and ways to survive, but it still needs me to learn and understand in my later life. I also hope that my sharing will bring you the necessary thinking.
Comments on the weakness of human nature (IV): The weakness of human nature is the essence of Carnegie's thought and career. Through vivid stories and easy-to-understand principles, the book excavates 60 weaknesses hidden in the human body from the perspective of human nature. Only when a person knows himself and constantly transforms himself can he make continuous progress until he succeeds! Carnegie's writing style is not very profound, it is all ordinary little things, but Carnegie's artistic soul is embedded in the book. His reaction to these little things was unexpected, which shocked my heart and made me feel so small. The world will not stop turning because of losing Carnegie, but because of him. With his insight into human nature, Mr. Carnegie used the stories of many ordinary people's continuous efforts to get success. Through his speeches and books, he aroused the fighting spirit of countless lost people and inspired our future generations to achieve brilliant success.
The tips and suggestions in the book "The Weakness of Human Nature" are very operable and can be summarized in one sentence: If we recognize the weakness of human nature, we will get twice the result with half the effort and succeed smoothly. Rereading "The Weakness of Human Nature" made me realize that this weakness can be my own or someone else's. Knowing other people's weaknesses will make each of us make smooth progress in our daily communication; Knowing your own weaknesses can help you develop your strengths and avoid weaknesses, highlight your strengths, and build a perfect life. Working in a state-owned enterprise, I always remind myself to be prepared for danger in times of peace and constantly improve and enrich myself.
In the book, the author talks about how we should learn to appreciate others sincerely in our life and work. Carnegie said: "There is only one way to get others to do anything-give them what they want." "In your daily life journey, don't forget to leave a little praise for the world. This little spark of friendship will ignite the flame of friendship. " Yes! Carnegie said: "People are like this. When they do something wrong, they only blame others, not themselves. " Perhaps this sentence is not strange to us and is often used, but we have made some changes to it. After the change, it became, "He is like this. When he does something wrong, he will only blame others, not himself. " Seemingly subtle differences are actually subtle differences. When you say this sentence with one finger pointing at others, maybe the other finger is pointing at yourself! Carnegie hit the nail on the head by pointing out this bad habit.
We always like to be above others and talk about their right and wrong. Why can't we compare ourselves with them and look at ourselves? When others do badly, is what they do perfect? When you realize that you will make mistakes, you will rise to a higher level and sum up an eternal truth: "To err is human." ? The cause of this disease is the lack of understanding and tolerance between people. I will always remember what Wei Zi said when he interceded for the Queen in the finale of the TV series Princess Zhu Huan II, that is, "the greatest virtue in life is forgiveness". What's your attitude when people accidentally step on your feet when we are in the bus every day, and when people accidentally bump into you when we are walking on the road every day? Full of resentment, swearing or forgiving others and being kind to yourself?
When we think about things, we are always used to thinking from our own standpoint, so everything others do is wrong when it is different from ourselves, and so is it for others! But if both sides can look at themselves from the perspective of others, the result will be completely different. Seeing yourself from the perspective of others requires understanding and forgiving others' qualities and achievements. Only people who are not smart enough will criticize and complain about others-in fact, many stupid people will do so. Only when we learn to care about our friends sincerely can we win their greatest trust.
Comments on the weakness of human nature (5): The weakness of human nature This book is the most famous successful mentor in the 20th century: Dale. Carnegie's work This book brings together the essence of Carnegie's thoughts and the most wonderful materials. It is the author's most successful inspirational classic. Countless readers have not only walked out of the predicament, but also become outstanding people admired by the world through reading and practicing various methods mentioned in the book! After reading it, I know more about how to treat people in society. Second, six ways to make others like you have benefited me a lot. Its information is closely related to the real society and truly reflects the bits and pieces in life.
Chapter 1 I understand that not all people are interested in you and will care about you! If we just want to attract people's attention and make them interested in us, we will never have many sincere friends with water ... friends, real friends, not like that. For example, Emerson, the servant of President Roosevelt, told a story: Once, my wife asked the President what quail birds looked like.
Because she had never seen quail, President Roosevelt took pains to tell her. Some time later, my phone rang. Ames and his wife live in a small house in President Roosevelt's Oyster Bay House. My wife answered the phone. It was the president himself. President Roosevelt told her on the phone that there was a quail bird outside the window at the moment. If she looks out of the window, she can see it. Caring about such a small matter is one of the characteristics of President Roosevelt. How can a master like this not please his servant? Who can not love him? So, if you want others to like you, the first rule you must follow is: be sincerely interested in others. Seeing there, I think that people nowadays are too selfish, always self-centered and have too strong personality, which leads to a little detachment! Interpersonal relationships need to be sorted out!
The second chapter, how to leave a good impression. After reading two examples, A Woman with a Better Inheritance and Schwab, I realized that a smile can leave a good impression! A person's actions are more specific than what he says. The smile on his face is like this: "I love you, you make me happy, and I am very happy to meet you, so I love dogs. I firmly believe it is a truth ... You see that they like being close to us so much. When they see us, they are naturally happy, so people like them. Although smiling is a small matter, it is not easy to stick to it!
Chapter three, if you want to avoid trouble, please do so! President Roosevelt knew that one of the simplest, most obvious and most important ways to win goodwill is to remember each other's names and make others feel important ... but how many of us can do this? When people say that a stranger knows us, they have forgotten each other's names when they leave, even though they talked for a few minutes. I think remembering the names of everyone you come into contact with is a basic courtesy and a kind of respect for others!
Chapter four, how to cultivate beautiful and likable conversation. People who only talk about themselves will always think of themselves, and "only think of their own people" ... Dr. Badler, president of Columbia University, once said: such people are hopeless and uneducated! "Dr. Badler added:" No matter what kind of education he understands, it is still the same as no education. "
Remember: to the person you are talking to, his needs and problems are hundreds of times more important than yours. His toothache is far more important to him than the natural disaster that killed millions of people. He is more concerned about the healing of a small sore on his head than the big earthquake. Therefore, if you want others to love you, the fourth principle is to be a good listener and encourage others to talk more about themselves.
The fifth and sixth chapters are how to make people interested and how to make people fall in love with you quickly. I think to make others like you quickly, you must be interested first! How can we talk about love if we are not interested? Therefore, we must respect other people's speeches in daily conversations! If you want others to be interested in you, first of all, you should care about others and don't go your own way! In this way, from interest to liking, you will get a quick upgrade!
The book The Weakness of Human Nature can be regarded as a mirror. Through reading, you will find your own weakness, which points out your indecent words and deeds! So, after reading it, I corrected my impolite language and indecent behavior. Some people may think that this is a trivial matter, but it is this detail that cannot be ignored that can decide everything! The so-called details can determine success or failure! After reading Carnegie's book, I have been updated ideologically and spiritually, which is conducive to better development in society!
After reading "The Weakness of Human Nature" (VI): For a moment, I always wanted to prove that the other party was also at fault and responsible through various methods. On the long road of proof, I realized failure, because what I wanted to prove would cause strong defense and even hatred from the other side. At this time, I am still wondering.
In fact, it is wrong to prove that these things are right or wrong. Win or lose is a lose-lose. Instead of blindly blaming others for their mistakes, it is better to give each other the most sincere understanding and praise, and put yourself in each other's shoes to think about the problem. If I were in the other person's position, would these thoughts and practices be more serious than me? I am not a perfect person. I often make mistakes, so why should I blame others?
The bad behavior of others affects you, which only shows that you have different perspectives on things. For example, it is your own reason that others call you in the middle of the night, which makes you have bad ideas. It's impolite to make a phone call in the middle of the night. Making a phone call itself is a provocation to yourself. This is your internal perspective. All the problems are in my heart, and I need to care for my growing heart. Looking at the problem from multiple angles, it will be easy to understand why others have these thoughts and behaviors.
You can't imitate others, all you can do is yourself. Happy self, being yourself and showing more advantages is a happy life. When you love yourself, your different emotions (anger, sadness, happiness, worry, anxiety, depression, disappointment, etc. ) and your noble and dirty thoughts, you find that you can understand others. No one's thoughts are all noble. There have been all kinds of people who think the worst of human nature, and there are also people who think the best. However, as long as you know yourself, you can live happily!
Finally, blaming others is to get self-satisfaction and pass the buck. Being accused means that the accused is still very important in the mind of the accused, hehe!
Comments on "The Weakness of Human Nature" (7): The author of "The Weakness of Human Nature" is Carnegie from the United States and is known as "the father of adult education". As the author briefly said, in the United States in the first half of the 20th century, when economic depression, inequality, war and other demons were destroying the soul of human beings in pursuit of a perfect life, Mr. Carnegie used his insight into human nature to make use of many stories of ordinary people's continuous efforts to succeed. It is this brief introduction that interests me to know what is written in it, and it has such great power.
Only after reading Carnegie's works did I know that there is a book that teaches people how to deal with people. This book is just right for us who are about to enter the society. Learning how to deal with others is not only conducive to improving one's potential, making oneself better integrated into society, thus achieving success, but also conducive to integrating oneself with the people around, making others happy and making oneself happy.
In fact, the relationship between people is very subtle. A look and a word will have an impact on the people around you.
For example, when dealing with friends, we should learn to be tolerant, especially when dealing with friends' faults. As Carnegie said, "criticism will not change the facts, but will lead to resentment." Pay attention to the so-called "criticism" This is one of the basic principles of getting along with friends. However, when you get along with friends at ordinary times, you should learn to appreciate them sincerely. Everyone is eager to be affirmed and appreciated. When friends succeed, it is very touching to give them the most sincere thanks. "In your daily life journey, don't forget to leave a little praise for the world. This little spark will ignite the flame of friendship. " Carnegie really hit the nail on the head. Friends are a very important part of our lives, so we should cherish them and know how to treat this rare friendship.
So how do you treat strangers? When we enter a group and society, we will meet people we don't know. What do we do? In fact, the reason is the same. When dealing with the same thing, we must respect his personal opinion and be friendly to others. It is not good to impose our views on others. Just because everyone is equal, you have your ideas and I have mine, so only when we respect each other and get along well can we reach an agreement to solve the problem.