Sometimes it rains because the world needs washing; Sometimes it rains in the eyes, because the heart needs washing!

Stand on the shore of the years and be a Shui Piao for your past.

I marry you, I protect you, love you all my life, love you all my life!

Life is like a journey, what matters is not the destination. But NB along the way, the mood when dealing with NB!

Your husband is sleeping in another place, and you are forced to get up.

The PE teacher said: Whoever dares to wear a skirt to my class will be punished for handstand!

Living in my heart, have you paid the rent?

You let me down. I didn't even give you a chance to go on stage.

If life deceives me, then I will also deceive life.

I don't do what I regret, I only do what you regret.

You can't eat as a meal, but I can't eat without you.

How big a body do you have to be to support your dirty soul!

The highest state of being a man is not that you pick up girls, but that girls pick up girls.

You will be tired if you have the heart, but it doesn't matter if you don't have the heart.

I despise those who often chat with expressions.

Zhuge Liang never led a soldier before he came out of the mountain. Why should I have work experience?

My eyes are crying for you, but my heart is holding an umbrella for you.

Childhood ignorance is beloved, youth ignorance is funny; Ignorance and misfortune of youth; Ignorance in middle age is sad, and ignorance in old age is sad.

I am like a fly lying on the glass, with a bright future, but I can't find a way out.

We should learn to be grateful. He's here. I love him. That's enough.

My friend's name in his girlfriend's mobile phone is him, and then they broke up.

Friends around you, get famous quickly, so that my memoirs can sell well.

I will try my best to realize my dream and make up for the cow I blew when I was a child.

I have passed a person countless times, and my clothes were all scratched without any spark.

Shake if you like, or roll if you don't like.

Summer is not good. When I was poor, I didn't even have to drink the northwest wind.

Cooperation is actually a kind of friendship. With the help of your opponent, you can improve your intelligence. Those who are afraid of cooperation have lost to your opponent.

Grandpa was handed down from his grandson.

Humble surface, covering up the inner abnormal condition.

Come out, my wife will change sooner or later!

It is said that the world is strange from now on ~ what is the world? Turn around and turn your back on you. It's the end of the world.

Doing well in the exam depends on sitting at the same table.

At school, that money was used to dawdle, and now it is used to dawdle!

Some people always sell what they have in exchange for what they don't have.

To love yourself, you must be selfish first. Only selfishness can love deeply.

Guinness Book of Records: The world's largest coffee table covers an area of 10000 square kilometers and can hold 1 100 million cups.

How boring it is to break up Play divorce if you can!

When a mouse gets angry, everyone is a sick cat.

Men have gold under their knees. I cut off my whole leg and didn't even find a copper coin!

If you were a flower, cows would not dare to shit in the future!

If my friends can sell them for five dollars each, I can make a small fortune.

The world belongs to us and our sons, but in the end it belongs to those grandchildren.

I never lie, except this sentence.

I like you so much that you will die.

I allow you to walk into my world, but I don't allow you to walk around in my world.

Carousel is the most cruel game in the world, chasing each other, but always separated by a sad distance.

There is no room for two tigers in one mountain unless there is a male and a female.

Planting grass won't make people lie down. Why don't you plant cactus?

How dare I not believe that you have the face to lie?

Why do I often have gum in my eyes? That's my deep love for sleep.

Don't think that just because you are younger than me, you can scamper for a few more days. The coffin is filled with dead people, not old people!

I am poor, please don't rob the tomb!

Qq classic funny humor phrases

1, what I originally wanted was not what I want now.

The deepest loneliness is not being alone for a long time, but having no expectation in my heart.

You were in my heart when you were thin, and then you got fat and got stuck in it.

Use my eyes to protect you from every intersection you are not aware of.

5, everyone will be afraid, especially when they cherish it desperately, but they still can't keep anything.

6. Why do we want too much? Simplicity is tempting.

7. Keep your thoughts in your heart and let the monsoon gradually thin your face.

8. On the edge of the years, watch the monsoon and read the past, shaking off the vicissitudes of time.

9. Time is long enough to make love change.

10, I am very happy with you.

1 1, in fact, you are very good, but I don't deserve it.

12, ╰ ┣ Lala Lala, do you love me?

13, you know me, I never pretend in front of you.

14, for me, money is more attractive than men, because money won't betray me.

15, separated, can't be friends. Stranger.

16, I understand now. The original words of breaking up, this sentence. How tangled,

17, always like this, you can forget it in the blink of an eye.

18, my love means that I can't stop, but I can't say that I have experienced it.

19, telling endless sadness with the soul.

20. If you can't give me a promise, don't introduce me to someone. Just pull down the hook.

2 1, I can't help falling in love with you.

22, like Germany, don't like Germany, one can speak sweet words.

23. > > I want to stay with you until the end of the last song.

The moment you left me, my sky seemed to be a colorless cloud.

I'm starting to hate you. I am very tired.

26. I don't know much about music, so sometimes I'm not very reliable and sometimes I'm not very good at tuning.

27. I'm losing weight, but I don't have to diet or exercise. I use consciousness-I will lose weight.

28. At school, I like to ask my deskmate when the class will be over.

29. Don't tell me you are not short of money. In that case, come on, you throw it out and I'll do it. ...

It's a fine day today. I stayed indoors for a long time and am going to play in the living room.

Humorous mood phrases

Humorous mood phrases

1. May sings: Can I hug you? Xu Liangsang: No, sir.

2. If a boy doesn't have more than six abdominal muscles, why should he laugh at other girls for their poor figure?

3. People who live in my heart. Aren't you coming out yet? It's about to be dismantled.

4. Do you find that those who don't like me are extremely superficial?

It's not just the teeth that are hard to extricate themselves, but also the long pants.

6. One day, I took down the TV at home. Mom said: if you are fine, it will be sunny. If you are not good, I will kill you.

7. What is the way to come out? The sage answered: waste.

8. Lori has three good qualities, soft body+light voice+easy to push down. The goddess has three treasures, why should she take a bath? Diaosi has three wastes. Are you there?+Busy+Go to bed early. Gao Shuai abounds in three treasures: iphone+ sports car+and watch. Auricularia auricula has three treasures:+cosmetic contact lenses+high heels+black silk foot. Otaku has three advantages: Dota+ gay friends+broken computer. Small and fresh has three treasures: bangs+waist support +45-degree angle!

9. "What's the phone number of120?" "Are you stupid? What's the number of 120? Your pig won't call 1 14 to ask? "

10. Some people say that bananas will be easier to keep when they are bought, because they think bananas are not picked from trees. ...

1 1. When I was a child, I never told my family about fighting. I'm afraid my father will make a mountain out of a molehill.

12. In the first grade of primary school, once in a quiet class, I saw the classmate sitting in front of me quietly put his hand in his ass, then quietly held his tight hand out of the window and quietly opened it in the wind ... More than ten years have passed, and I have never seen such a person with public morality.

13. When I was in college, the toilet was an old-fashioned row of pits with no doors. One night, the toilet light was broken and I found a pit. When I squatted down, I held my ass in one hand and a deep voice sounded: Someone!

14. Is the child born to two people with type B blood type 2B?

15. Computers and I have the same language. Every time I look at it gently, it collapses subconsciously.

16. Why is RMB so expensive? Because grandpa Mao spoke for him.

17. It turns out that my mobile phone is of Russian royal descent and can only play Tetris.

18. Why do you want me to move? I tell you, even if China moves, I won't move.

19. I am interested in studying, but I failed my course.

20. A teacher asked the students. Why does the body get cold after death? A student replied: peace of mind is naturally cool.

2 1. Don't engage in porcelain without Jin Gangzuan, and don't wear short skirts without golden hoops.

22. Everyone likes to eat Master Kong. If you eat Master Kong, Mrs. Kang will have no companion, and you will have to marry the white elephant.

23. Are you dissatisfied with the world when you grow up like this?

24. Are you cheap, mistress is there, infertile.

25. Don't fart before you go to college, but fart when you come to college!

26. Why does the heart hurt? Because you have a heart attack.

27. I am not the wind, and you are not the sand. No matter how lingering, you can't reach the end of the world.

28. Growing up, the only constant is the heart that doesn't like reading.

29. The weather is fine today. I stayed indoors for a long time and am going to play in the living room.

30. I am relieved to know that you are not doing well.

3 1. The day after tomorrow, how many tomorrows! Since there are so many, we might as well postpone it again.

32. "I congratulate you, sir." The patient almost jumped up with joy: "am I saved?" The doctor said, "No, I congratulate you. You will die of a new disease without precedent. We are going to name it after you die."

33. One day, an abbot gave a lecture in an elective course of Buddhism. As usual, the students asked several questions: Q: Master, does this course have a name? A: I didn't ask: Master, did you take this course? A:No. Q: Master, what about the final grade? A: Let it be. The whole class collapsed.

34. Leave a message on a disease consultation website. Q: Doctor, I haven't been able to sleep recently and I'm depressed. I can't eat. Am I swollen? Doctor: How old are you this year? A: 15 years old. Doctor: You haven't finished writing winter vacation homework, have you?

35. "I was", "I was a friend", "I was a classmate" and "other people's children" are called the four unsurpassable gods.

Don't smile at me with your pirated Mona Lisa smile. My stomach is not as strong as you think.

37. Congratulations on winning the grand prize. Please come to the People's Bank of China with sabre, shotgun and soil cannon at 10 this evening.

38. Some people don't even know their neighbors, but they are extremely concerned about whether there are aliens in the world.

39. The winter vacation is only 20 days away! These days, it takes 33 days to be lovelorn.

40. Have you found that people around you who love to laugh are ticklish?

4 1. No matter what you are, the second child is there, no three no four!

42. It is said that you should kiss the test paper first, which is called "passing".

43. Eating food is kind, because you just want to eat every day and have no time to calculate others.

44. I held out three fingers and said, "I'll give you five words: nonsense!" " " .

Qq mood humor phrase

1, teacher, wait, I'll let Buddha marry you! Even if you are taken away, I will use flowers instead of trees.

3. Earned 200 million, lost memory once, and remembered once.

4. I blame myself for being too young, whether it is a man or a dog.

Xiaoming ate Mapo tofu and was stabbed to death by Mapo.

6, playing is pro, swearing is love, love is not enough!

7. Sometimes, you don't know how hurtful your words are.

8. Who is the future girlfriend I am in love with now?

9. What do you want me to do, steamed or braised?

10, are you tired? Just tired. Comfort is for the dead.

1 1, I am not responsible for not knowing whether the food is expensive or not, and I don't know whether I am fat or not without taking pictures.

12 Why are you so free? Because my salt value is high.

13, boys should show their teeth instead of pouting.

14, in the future, you will definitely thank you for your hard work now.

15. Touching your mobile phone while doing your homework is like chewing dazzling gum.

16. If there is a funeral for homework, all students will be dressed up.

17, how many years, my toilet seat has never been lifted!

18, if you really want to find me, how can I not reply to you?

19, to increase learning, reduce pride, seize opportunities, and put an end to laziness.

20. My mother said that the prodigal son will never change his money. Who will give me gold? I will change.

2 1, no matter how bad the mud is, as long as it turns to the wall, something can always stick.

22. This won't, that won't, are two things I won't do in my life.

23. To live is to toss and turn, because we will all die for a long time.

24. Sometimes the smallest thing will occupy the biggest space in your heart.

25. A woman said to a man, Come to my house and I'll give you something to eat.

26. Just because I saw you more in the classroom, you asked me to go to the podium to do the problem.

27. The bell in class is more pleasant than the national anthem, and the bell in class is more collapsed than embarrassment.

28. Taking a math exam is like being a doctor. Anyway, the first sentence is I tried my best.

29. Happiness is the only perfection of love, and tears are the beautiful encounter of wrong love.

30. Angels can fly because they despise themselves.

3 1, I suggest that Japanese women be arrested and put into our male prison.

32. I want to go to the toilet to calm down. Eating shit won't solve the problem.

33. Happiness, can it not be as short as a rainbow?

34. When I live to this age, the only thing I can put down is chopsticks.

35. Those who have poured cold water on me, I will definitely boil it back to you.

36. Every time I quarrel with others, I always feel that I have not played well and want to quarrel.

37. I changed her from a girl to a woman; She turned me from a boy into a poor man.

38. Do you believe that a girl will always come to this world to torture you?

39. My back itches. Should I change? Stop it. It's just that you should take a bath.

40. When you ignore me, I feel that you are studying hard and preparing to support me in the future.

4 1. Some people test their strength, others test their eyesight, and I test it entirely by imagination.

42. I think you are really not a qualified friend. You'd better switch to be my wife!

43. The palaces are locked together with beads and jade. The palace can really be locked, can't it?

44, too depressed is not good, everything is enough, don't go too far, you can pretend nothing.

45. If my life is a TV series, then you are an advertisement that has been killed halfway.

46, the monster is a good boy, he will say to Altman; Don't be sad, just hit me.

47. Life is the mouth of Song Like Zedd. You never know who will be unlucky next.

48. Men have gold under their knees. I cut off my whole leg and didn't even find a copper coin!

49. What gifts will you receive on National Day? I will receive a pile of homework!

50. In fact, we are all three good students. Our three virtues are: having a good time, eating well and sleeping well.

5 1, what a lovely creature it would be if mosquitoes sucked fat instead of blood.

52. Time and tide wait for no man. First of all, women are not spared. Opportunity waits for no man. First of all, you can't wait for a man.

53. I saw an aunt burning paper that day and muttered that she received it. Don't buy funds ~

54. Sorry, sister in front, you are a little huge, blocking my cell phone signal.

The kindergarten teacher hit a boy because the boy ate the girl's boobs.

56. How many couples have been destroyed and how many people have been seen through the roaming chat recording function of smart phones.

57. When someone asks me what happiness is, I tell them that happiness means that the person I love smiles at me.

Please don't call me an otaku, please tell me to close the house. Please don't call me a house girl, please call me Madame Curie.

59. If you can't dress your woman in a wedding dress, don't stop you from unbuttoning her clothes!

60. The happiest thing in the world is making love; The happiest thing in the world is to have a rest and have sex again.

6 1, this QQ is a long-term agent to chat up and be accosted, and welcomes women and children to negotiate with a smile. .

Friends around you, get famous quickly, so that my memoirs can sell well.

You, don't talk, you lower the IQ of the whole street. You turn around. You influenced my thinking.

64. I laughed when someone said my photo was ugly. That's because you haven't seen my real person. It's ugly!

65. Girls, a boy hitting you lightly is to make you coquetry, not to make you fight back ten times as hard.

It's not our fault that we don't want to do our homework. It is our fault that people set summer vacation and winter vacation in the hottest and coldest season.

67. Can I help you with CPR? I didn't expect you to push your breast so fresh and refined.

68. I miss you during the day, miss you at night, dream of you, look at you with my eyes, hold you in my hand and love you in my heart!

69. Flowers from Shui Piao to water, one kind of acacia, two places of leisure. There is no way to eliminate this situation, only frown and mind.

70. Model husband: Model daughter-in-law has the final say. If the wife wants to eat cake, she likes porridge. As soon as his wife stared, she stood against the wall.

7 1. What does it mean to repay a drop of water with a gushing spring? It means that if someone throws a drop of water at you, you throw him to death with a bucket of water.

72. Don't tell me it's cold, take care of yourself and put on more clothes, or take care of me or buy me clothes with money.

73. I heard a foreigner crying on the subway: You don't love me at all! You just study English with me!

74. If you treat me like a kite, either let me go or take me home. Don't bind me with an invisible emotion, it will break my heart.

75. Gently, a fallen leaf floated into my heart, occupying all my heart. Slowly, my heart drifted away with the fallen leaves, and I can't get it back.

76. I have been poor and crazy recently, and I have no money to buy big cakes, so I can only eat steamed bread. Flatten the steamed bread if you want to eat pie. If you want noodles, comb the steamed bread with a comb a few times.

77. Let me ask you, do you usually wipe your ass with your left hand or your right hand after defecation? All right, right hand. What? ! I thought you wiped it with paper!

Be kind to yourself, eat more fruits and vegetables, have balanced nutrition, don't be picky about food, remember to exercise more, and your blood will be healthy! Mosquito said to me with concern.

I want to buy a tank. Then buy it. Can't afford it, it's so expensive. Take a credit card and swipe it. What should I do if I have to pay back my credit card? What are you afraid of? You have tanks.

80. After Fiona Fang lost his memory, Di Renjie: Fiona Fang! I'm Dee Renjie! Don't you remember me? Fiona Fang drew his sword, pointed it at Di Renjie and said savagely, "Bullshit! I've only heard of Valentine's Day. Where are the days of the enemy? !

8 1, the tour guide should have the mother-in-law's mouth and mother's heart, treat the guests, learn from A Qing's wife, laugh when you meet, and don't think much afterwards; All the guests came, all with one mouth. As soon as people leave, the tea gets cold, everything at home is thriving, and the family never stops.