In his later years, he had nothing and was extremely humble in front of his son and daughter-in-law. Such an old man is indeed sympathetic, but it is not unreasonable. Since ancient times, loving mothers have lost many children.
For children, how much you love them, how domineering they are; How hard you work, how comfortable they are!
"I went to my son's house, and the old couple cried into tears."
In the TV series "Anjia", Lao Yan and his wife opened a steamed stuffed bun shop in the city, leaving early and returning late every day. Throughout the year, his son saved enough 3 million before he got married. The old couple are reluctant to eat and drink and are bent on giving their son a better life.
The family went to buy a house together, and the intermediary advised Lao Yan and his wife to take appropriate loans and leave some money in their hands. But Lao Yan and his wife said that it is not easy for children to just come out to work. They don't want to burden him too much, so they want to buy it in full.
Before signing, the son and the "prospective wife" excitedly told them that the "prospective wife" was pregnant and asked the old couple to add the woman's name. Lao Yan and his wife are honest people. Without much thought, they happily wrote the couple's names on the real estate license.
When they happily packed their bags and prepared to move in with their son and daughter-in-law to serve their pregnant daughter-in-law, they were embarrassed at the door for a long time and finally had to go home. The old couple used their life savings to buy a house for their son, but they couldn't even get in.
Mother-in-law poked her head out of the door and asked, "Who is it?" It turns out that my mother-in-law has moved in, and she is "anti-customer-oriented" and asked the old couple to come up and sit down sometime. Daughter-in-law saw them in the room, pursed her lips and stared at them, looking very unhappy, and then turned her head and slammed the door.
The son also came out to "explain" to his parents and let them go back first. He didn't even invite them in for a drink. The old couple forced a smile and told their son that it was all right, so that he could take care of his daughter-in-law and mother-in-law without worrying about his parents.
Carrying luggage downstairs, the old couple didn't speak, so they rode back on a tricycle, and the old Yan's wife behind them couldn't help it any longer, hiding her face and sobbing. Back at the steamed stuffed bun shop, the old couple hugged each other and cried.
After decades of ups and downs, selling steamed buns for his son to go to college and saving 3 million yuan to buy a house for his son, how powerful this is for the elderly, and how their efforts are trampled by their ungrateful and cherished sons and daughters-in-law!
I can't help thinking that if the old couple think more about themselves and don't care so much about their son, they will pay a down payment, let them repay their mortgage and have some money in their hands, then their old age will not be so passive and humble!
"The old man who can't get 80,000 bride price is too scared to say anything."
There are still many parents who do their best for their children like Anjia Laoyan and his wife.
When Aunt Li's son was getting married, he thought that the young couple were both working in the city, and he was embarrassed to let them rent a house after marriage. The old couple are also ordinary workers. They haven't saved any savings in their lives, but they still have hundreds of thousands of deposits.
So the old couple discussed whether to buy a house for their son in the city, so that they can live in peace after marriage.
Originally, Aunt Li wanted to buy a small two-bedroom apartment for her son in full, but when her son found out, he felt that the house was too small, saying that it would be even more stressful to change it when he had a child. The old couple felt sorry for their son, so they gritted their teeth and took out all their savings and bought their son a three-bedroom apartment.
After the renovation, my son came to see Aunt Li again, saying that the young couple had no money and asked their parents to help. In desperation, Aunt Li's husband took out the only 100,000 yuan in the provident fund originally reserved for himself and his wife for self-defense.
After the house and decoration are done, I am going to get married by the day. The woman's family asked for a bride price of 80 thousand yuan. Aunt Li and his wife were so anxious that they stayed awake for two days. In addition to the bride price, they have to prepare a banquet money!
At that time, buying a house was over budget. Later, the renovation hollowed out the capital. Now the old couple really have no money. It's hard to retire, so why lend money to my son to get married?
In a dilemma, Aunt Li called her son and asked him if he could pay for it himself. Who knows, my son got angry on the spot and said, "If this daughter-in-law can't get married, I will hate you for life. How to find your own money. I have no money. Isn't marrying a son what parents should do? How can you keep the money? "
Aunt Li was so angry that the old couple were speechless. Later, they pieced together, but they only took 50 thousand yuan and went to the woman's house to propose. As soon as Aunt Li gave the bride price money, the woman's family immediately changed her face and even said strangely, "I can't afford 80,000 pieces of bride price, and I still want to marry my daughter?"
Aunt Li and his wife quickly explained that the remaining 30 thousand will be made up when they get married, and all the money will be used to buy a house. Now they really can't come up with so much at once.
Who knows, the relatives of the woman's family also came to help, saying that the money was not enough, and they rolled up their sleeves to drive Aunt Li away. The two old people were speechless.
When the daughter-in-law saw it, she burst into tears. She was busy coaxing her daughter-in-law when her son glared at her parents.
Later, the wedding was held as scheduled, and Aunt Li and his wife also collected the remaining 30,000 yuan as a bride price on the wedding day. I went to my son's house on my wedding day, and no one gave them a good look. Aunt Li hid in the toilet several times and secretly wiped her tears.
After the wedding, my son and daughter-in-law seldom contact the old couple, and sometimes they really miss calling. My son is cold, too. As for the three-bedroom apartment that I spent all my savings on for my son and daughter-in-law, the old couple didn't go to live there for a day. ...
Old people must learn to leave a way out for themselves.
It is said that children are married, parents' home is still children's home, but children's home will not be parents' home, so the elderly should never expect children's home to accommodate you.
No matter how big the child is, it will always be a child in the hearts of parents. It is understandable that the old people are eager to love their children, but they should also learn to leave a way out for themselves appropriately. They can't be with their son wholeheartedly. Then when one day he ignores you, the old people will be very disappointed.
What should I do? I hope every old man can understand the following three points.
1. Buy a house for my son. If the money is not too much, pay them a down payment.
Let young people bear some pressure, they will know the hardships of life, work harder and cherish it better, otherwise the burden will be entirely on their parents, and they will think that their parents are relaxed and have more complaints. When life is difficult, parents can help appropriately, but like mortgage, they have to bear it themselves.
2, don't spoil children too much, all principles have a bottom line.
We must never meet the demands of our children unconditionally. The word "do what you can" also applies to parents. Don't compromise yourself in order to satisfy your son.
Older people should also think more about themselves and save some money for their old age.
Of course, you have to rely on children when you can't take care of yourself, but when you can take care of yourself, children are mostly unreliable. No matter how much the old man loves his children, there is no guarantee that the children will love you back. Therefore, you should still have money in your pocket, so that you will not be wronged in your later years and have the right and freedom to choose your life.
Bai once said: If you want your children to be excellent and promising, you have to be willing to let them suffer. If you don't want your children to suffer, then the parents themselves will suffer in the end.
I hope every old man can love his son in an appropriate way, love himself more while loving his children, and raise a grateful, enterprising, responsible, respectful and filial child.