-01-

I watched a documentary online, "Leftover Women in China" directed by an Israeli director.

When it comes to older leftover women, I believe most people’s first impression is: picky, high-minded, unrealistic, etc. They seem to have some bad impressions.

In the documentary, we see another kind of leftover woman, a poor woman struggling between reality and ideals. After watching the documentary, my heart couldn't calm down for a long time.

I can’t help but wonder, how did the leftover women come into being? Why does the social phenomenon of leftover women occur? Whose responsibility lies?

With doubts, I went to the Internet to check a lot of relevant information, and finally found that the phenomenon of leftover women is related to all aspects of society, and the main reason lies in the changes in society’s views on marriage and love. The reasons for the older leftover women themselves.

With the development of society, people’s views on marriage and love have also changed. Nowadays, more and more people are pursuing material things. Even when they get married, they also pay attention to whether the material conditions of the marriage partner are rich. In this environment, many women's criteria for choosing a spouse have also changed. Start asking if men are rich and powerful.

-02-

And women are becoming more and more picky, and when the men they choose are already much better than themselves, older leftover women also appear.

“If you are not good enough, you are not good enough” is a true portrayal of a large number of leftover women. He is obviously a pheasant, but he feels that he is a phoenix, and he wants to marry a dragon. I don’t think there is a dragon in the world that would be so stupid as to choose a pheasant instead of the real phoenix.

There are other reasons that can also lead to the emergence of older leftover women. There are many reasons, but most of them are due to the women's own problems.

The reader Qingyu is an older leftover woman. Like other leftover women, she is particularly disgusted with the title of "older leftover woman". But I have to admit that I am getting older and it is becoming more and more difficult to find a partner.

Qingyu considers herself a literary young woman. She is very emotional and always likes to pursue romance. In college, she completely let herself go and began to pursue the sweetness of love. As long as it was a man she liked, she would work hard to fight for it.

Emotionally rich, she began to lose her previous interest in love, feeling that it was just that. When love fails to stimulate her, it will have a huge impact on the future.

Moreover, Qingyu also fell in love with a black man when he was in college. The black man was an overseas student. Qingyu talked with him for a while and felt that there was still a big difference in his thoughts and personalities, so they broke up.

-03-

Qing Yu has always remembered that relationship experience, and it was also regarded as something to show off to her. She felt that it was something worth showing off that she had fallen in love with a foreigner. It shows that she is well-informed and much better than other women.

After graduating from college, Qingyu chose to go to first-tier cities because she felt that first-tier cities were attractive to her and suitable for her. After finding a job, Qingyu began her journey of success.

But everyone living in first-tier cities knows that urban life is fast-paced, stressful, and expensive. Qing Yu usually yearned for a petty bourgeoisie life, so she spent money lavishly and could not make ends meet. She opened several credit cards and lived a life of a "card slave".

Qingyu has had several relationships over the years, but they all ended in failure. Because those men cannot give Qing Yu the life she wants, most of them are just like Qing Yu, very poor.

Qing Yu feels that since she is so good, she should live a good life and find a high-quality man. So she became more and more picky. In the past, we were in love, so we could be more casual, but now we are getting married, so we can't be careless.

-04-

You can imagine Qingyu's situation. Almost all the men she likes will not like her, and she dislikes the men who like her. We're in a situation where we can't settle for a high level or a low level.

As she got older, Qingyu discovered that the few men who originally liked her had disappeared. She found one of the men and asked why, and the man said disdainfully: "I was interested in you when you were young, but who would want you now that you are so old?"

After Qingyu heard this , was so angry that he cursed this man. But as time passed, she discovered that what the man said became reality.

My parents have been urging Qingyu to get married as soon as possible, and told her to stop being picky. It would be great if you could find a man who wants you at your age. Her parents arranged many blind dates for her. No matter how unwilling she was, Qingyu had to accept this fact and began to go on blind dates obediently.

She actually met someone with good conditions at first, and it had been a few months since the two broke up. However, the man later heard that Qingyu had dated a black boyfriend and disappeared.

Qingyu asked him why, but the man just told her that he couldn't accept the fact that you were with a black man.

After that, Qingyu came into contact with several more men. Without exception, when they learned that Qingyu had dated a black man, they all shook their heads and walked away.

-05-

Now Qingyu is in an embarrassing situation. She is getting older and older, there are fewer and fewer men around her, and her own advantages are getting smaller and smaller. Moreover, she never dared to tell anyone about her relationship with a black man, because as soon as the man heard about it, he immediately turned around and left.

But Qingyu is still full of doubts, what’s wrong with having a black boyfriend? I didn’t break the law, so why can’t men accept it? Are they racist?

In fact, the vast majority of older leftover women will expose such shortcomings, that is, they have high ambitions and low abilities. In this way, you will fall into a vicious circle. The man you like will not like you, and you will not like the man who likes you. This creates a vicious cycle, and older leftover women are born.

If older leftover women do not change their ideas on mate selection, it will be difficult for them to find a man who suits them. In the end, people have to keep their feet on the ground. Marriage is not a transaction, let alone a market where you wait for a price.

Pursue love with your heart and treat marriage with sincerity, and only then can you gain sincere love and a happy marriage.